Love and the Mystery of Betrayal
Recovering Your Trust and Faith After Trauma, Deception, and Loss of Love
By Sandra Lee Dennis, Ph.D.
The depth of the pain romantic betrayal causes is difficult to put into words. Discovering that your romantic partner, the person who claimed to be your soul mate, proclaimed unending love and promised a future of golden togetherness, was lying all along and totally deceived you, causes indescribable agony.
Based on her own heart wrenching experience, Sandra Lee Dennis, Ph.D., has put this suffering into words.
Sandra also offers psychological and biological explanations for her reactions. She points out, for example, that the need for attachment — ties to other human beings — is hardwired into our brains. Thousands of years ago, social ties were crucial for the survival of the species, and they still are.
That’s why our brains go haywire with the loss of a romantic partner — we feel like our very survival is in doubt. The trauma of betrayal is so great, Sandra says, that true recovery requires spiritual healing. Sandra relates how she slowly moved through the experience, eventually reaching a place of peace.
In the end, Sandra suggests that romantic betrayal, as harsh as it is, may serve an important purpose. It may be a catalyst for the collapse of the false self, and an invitation to grow closer to source, love or God — however you conceive of your higher power.
Love and the Mystery of Betrayal may help you understand your reaction to an intimate betrayal, and find deep, transformative meaning in the experience.