Reply To: 2.5 months and haven't heard from him… Help!
Lovefraud: How to recognize and recover from sociopaths, psychopaths, narcissists and other abusers › Forums › Lovefraud Community Forum – General › 2.5 months and haven't heard from him… Help! › Reply To: 2.5 months and haven't heard from him… Help!
Hi Taylorlynnx11, it’s good that you are honest about what you want and what you need from him. You have to remember that he pretended to be someone he is not and love bombed you into a relationship with him.
Guess what he is doing now with another woman (maybe many women)?
Yep. He is love bombing her.
And she is loving all his attention and she is showering him with attention. And that is what he wants. HE is getting his “supply” of attention. She is feeding his ego. She only sees him in a “good” light, but she will soon be cheated on too.
Will he return to you? will he call you?
Most narcissist will only call their past victims when they have no new supply. This could be 5 months from now, 5 days from now or 20 years from now.
This is why it’s important now to open your mind up from his manipulation & brain washing to see him for exactly how he is…not who he pretended to be.
My guess is he is young, athletic, has money and will have an endless supply of new victims. Maybe when he is 40 he will not be able to get a new victim quite so easily & this is when he will reach out to a victim…maybe you, maybe someone else in his past, who can easily be manipulated out. One who is not educated. YOU are educating yourself. This is good! This is a HUGE step!
I know it’s hard. I know you want to talk to him, you want to “fix” things with him. I know you want the “good guy” back. But he has shown you who he really is and you need to take your rose color glasses off and see the true guy he is = not a good guy.
Who do you do this? How do you see the true guy?
You have to be fully honest with yourself.
You have to fully see the whole relationship not just the “good” times. When you do this, you will see there were NO “good” times. There were more times then not that you bit your tongue so not to have a fight with him. There were times that you just wanted things to go back to the beginning when he was a “nice” guy who love bomb you…but it was all lies & manipulation.
What is your closure with this guy?
The fact that you found out he is a narcissist!!!
That is your closure!
Say that again:
What is my closure? I found out he is a narcissist!!
Then I educated myself on what a narcissist really is…
Then I set myself & mind free from him.
THAT IS CLOSURE!!
Hugs to you. It’s hard hon, but the No contact Rule is the best rule to get over him. It’s up to you to impose the No Contact Rule. That means you dont contact him and you dont let him contact you.
Wishing you the best.