lf1

Reply To: Damn…I let him in…again

#25207

jaybird
Participant

Thank you for your supportive words.

This last time, I actually tried to go no-contact, he didn’t really discard me. We got in a fight New Years Eve and I just was fed up with it! I wanted to start 2017 without him. I am tired of the drama and how it impacts my life.

His hoover was to find someone else and post on Facebook he was in a relationship and be very open about his new relationship. I tried everything to go “no contact” but he would find away to get to me at least every few days. I tried to be unemotional and tell him I wanted no contact.

The amount of time we stay apart (if you even consider it that) varies. The longest we’ve lived apart has been a few months, but we’ve always still had some contact. Over the last 2 years I have separated myself from all aspects of his life.

When I say worse, I mean what he does to hurt me is worse. This last time, he posted he was “in a relationship” on Facebook and posted all these loving pictures of them. He says he did all that to get my attention. Before that, he would send me pictures of woman he met, selfies of the two of them. He might say he is going to kill himself. Pictures and texts are the worst. That is why I don’t have a cell phone right now. At times he might be destructive or violent. Or he might just tell me over and over I am a liar and a whore and all the things I’ve done wrong.

I am not sure what is going to happen this time. I feel like my friends, my family, and my therapist are going to be so disappointed in me. I will see how this plays out. At lease this time I have educated myself. I know what I am dealing with.

My anxiety is at an all time high. I just want everything to be ok. Like you said we hope and hope.