Reply To: Broke up with narcissist and started no contact, having a really tough time
Lovefraud: How to recognize and recover from sociopaths, psychopaths, narcissists and other abusers › Forums › Lovefraud Community Forum – General › Broke up with narcissist and started no contact, having a really tough time › Reply To: Broke up with narcissist and started no contact, having a really tough time
It’s good to hear from you, but sorry that you’re the victim of his smear campaign. I relate, as I’m several years out and my ex psychopath is still spreading lies about me. It hurt me a lot at first; I learned to ‘rise above’ it to some extent. It sounds like you are doing the right think by refraining from bad mouthing him. People who know you won’t believe his slandering, and others will see what you are really like by observing your actions over time.
You loved the person he portrayed himself as, and you have experienced a real loss to be grieved and a real betrayal to recover from. You are normal and you can’t just turn your feelings off – it takes time.
Spaths hate everyone and everything. What he did and is doing is typical of spaths’ destruction and the pain they cause. It may be helpful to you to recognize that he will probably continue to do things that cause you consternation and make it difficult to maintain no contact and to move forward with your life.