Reply To: I am trying to go NC he has a wicked hold on me help!



Ladybug,,,congratulations on staying strong and know full well that who u thougth u married & who u fell in love with DID not exist,,,instead the man u married sounds emotionally and mentally abusive, borderline and some one just controlling and dangerous ….who was getting off on your pain and being cruel …you need to tap into what ever ANGER u can muster in order to protect yourself….u have the promise and the word of every survivor on here that your life WILL be better, more peaceful, honest and tranquil with this person totally out of your life,,,,call him what he is an Abuser, a Destroyer of heart & spirit…..do not use his name …when u think of him think of the insults & the demeaning abuse he loved to give you ….mine said to me after we married when he began to treat me and talk to me worse than a dog!!! (old term expression since I treat my dogs like kings but you get it right?) He says to me well now I am just more comfortable to show the REAL me !!! of great right!! that was after years & years together …was able to keep it locked up until the ring was on my finger then its like another person stepped in ,,heartless, brutal , selfish, a liar, cheater, nasty manipulator,,,,I was In love of the image of who I thougth he was or who he wanted me to think he was….now in hind sight 3 years post trauma ….and no contact … I see he is nothing but a little selfish narcissistic sociapth punk ,,,now he is making at least two other women’s life’s hell…and this guy is almost 70!!! if you cant change the sadness to anger, rage & disgust all the better for you

….use the anger to heal, to get strong….focus that energy on your self …enjoy your life it goes so fast …leave the little punk slithering in his own backwash and evil energy…..remember you miss things that did not exist….& its ok to still want love, a relationship, some one to care for you & yearn…etc.. that is what you are missing///yes yearn for those things that is fine…& know they are not within his grasp to know or give you
just know that these did not exist with him. ….

u cant get blood from a turnip…no matter how sad you feel, or how hard you try….peace to you and courage my dear!!! you are fabulous and stronger than you think as well as a lot wiser.!! :)))