lf1

Reply To: I am trying to go NC he has a wicked hold on me help!

#23027

lostandalone22
Participant

I am so glad to know that I am not alone nor am i “crazy” This has been the roughest time of my life honestly. I think one thing that messes with me is the fact that our whole relationship he called me out of my name only 3 times and never verbally degraded me even the the the day we were together told me how much he wanted me and our sex life was still amazing even after three years. But also we are both attractive people with plenty of opportunity for other partners although i never gave another man the time of day while we were together and he gave any girl who looked his way the opportunity.. Other than those things he is a straight psychopath to a T. I am currently reading Psychopath free and also have When Love is a Lie and Without Conscience. He lied about everything, stupid things, my favorite is One night i got home from work and asked him if he worked out(he is a professional mma fighter and our garage was a gym) He said yeah for like 2 hours…it had snowed the day before so there was snow on the ground but no footprints going to the garage.. i dealt with that stuff everyday.. When he knew i was on to him about something he would cause so much drama. I have never in my life had anxiety attacks until about a year after our relationship started. He even talked me into going to counseling for my anxiety problems!!!! They were all him and the intimidation he had over me.. Work is my escape I can stay busy and try to keep my mind off of him but as soon as i get home he is back in my head constantly. half the time i just stay in my room with the doors closed which i know isn’t good for me or my kids.