Con woman ordered to repay male victim
PDF Brenda Miguel admitted to stealing nearly $165,000 from an elderly New Jersey man in a sweetheart scam. She was sentenced to five years probation and ordered to make restitution.
Read Woman who swindled West Orange man out of $165K is sentenced to 5 years probation on Nj.com.
Brenda Miguel must also testify against her accomplice, a woman who is still at large.
For more about the scam, read Newark fugitive accused of stealing $164K from elderly man in captured in Florida after 3 years on Nj.com.
written by Donna Andersen • Permalink •
Ox Drover says:
Dear Bluejay,
Yea, he was going to “raise her from the dead!” He had all kinds of business scams, he was a real con man and then as he got older he got to be a real letch and had these cult-followers giving him their 8-9 year old daughters for his multiple wives, and the FEDS were the ones who finally got him for transporting them across state lines in his bus.
I will be interested to see the Oprah show tomorrow and hear from them what all went on. They’ve been pretty well protected up til now, the state took them away from their parents, some of whom, still BELIEVE in tony! DELUSION, but you know, I can understand how they can hhold on to those DELUSIONAL beliefs, Because I held on to the delusional belief that my P-son had a conscience and a soul too….so I am not throwing stones at those people. If anyone in the world has empathy for those deluded people it is me, but I still shake my head and say WHY????
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ErinBrock says:
Hope:
I think we all…..at least I, heard the promises…..over and over….
It’s the suck in……get you back hooked and comfy in fantasy land….so HE can take control and beat you to the punch.
The stronger he see’s you as……the weaker he will portray.
It’s pathetic…..it’s a pity play.
Once you show an ounce of compassion……the tables are turned on ya.
Just think about how sick this is for your kids to witness…….
If you think they aren’t seeing it……they are!
Be strong…..get out!
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geminigirl says:
Ive noticed this for years about my spath D. they totally see kindness a s weakness, and move in for the kill.
Every time shes got me to feel sorry for her with her sob stories, how mean her ex boss was,how her landlady is going to throw her out as she is behind with rent,how her car has broken down/car accident,she forgot ONE months car insurance, now shes not covered,how mean her ex husband is to her, yada yada on and on,how AMEX ring her up at work every day demanding money,etc. ALL stuff she has done to HERSELF! but no, its NEVER her fault,. poor baby.!! I used t get sucked in every single time. Not any more. This is why its so important I stay NC as Im sure Id get sucked in again by her croc tears. mamaGem.
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rkymtnhi says:
Although I agree that probation is a weak punishment for this woman, I do think it is a step in the right direction. The courts are finally waking up to the destruction that these sociopaths put on our society. I love that she was convicted specifically of “theft by deception”. That is exactly what it is and there has to be consequences!
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bluejay says:
Hopeforjoy,
Since we are compassionate people, I imagine that it is hard on you, being around your husband, swayed by his “pain.” Everyday is a struggle, wishing that I didn’t have the challenges that I have. I can be sympathetic toward my husband, but I have noticed that he is not protective of me, looking out for me. All the financial concerns are my problem – he doesn’t solve problems, instead, he creates them. He is the only person that I’ve known “up close” who has ever behaved so horribly, mistreating me (in my opinion following his father’s pattern, history repeating itself). My twin sister said that he married his mother, treating me how his father treated his wife (my mother-in-law). I think this is true. Anyway, I do not want to live out the rest of my life being emotionally abused – my feelings, emotional state being ignored, thus, I am keeping this man away from me. I am still making decisions, slowly (maybe even at a snail’s pace), but making them. Like the rest of us, you have experienced pain too (I don’t discount anyone’s pain). For whatever reason, we were all led to discover what our loved one(s) are afflicted with (hopefully for our benefit in the end), in my opinion, one of the worst mental disorders to have. What are we going to do with the information that we have about the disordered person – my h-spath has said that he doesn’t want to get a divorce (soon after he left me), but he is incapable of having a loving, fulfilling relationship. Also, his character bothers me, having too many unpleasant memories where he is concerned. I want more for myself, even if my dreams don’t pan out. Take care.
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bluejay says:
OxDrover and others,
I am wondering where Wini and Buttons have been, not seeing any posts from them recently.
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Ox Drover says:
Wini, “comes and goes” but not sure where Buttons is. Her son Mike moved out and she was pretty down about the “failure” of the relationship and being able to help him.
I wonder all the time about people who “disappear” (sometimes to check back in, sometimes not) and all I can do is to pray for them! (((hugs)))
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avictim says:
Well, she should be put in prison for 5 to 10 years. I would say that courts have to wakeup. I was a victim of a women who said she was a pschyologist and had a PHD. Today, after I divorced her and lost almost 40k because of her in 1 year, I was still in love with her, but I divorced her and even the ink is not dry, she is now married to another man. This women is a therapist who is supposed to be helping people. But, she is going around conning people like this, using their money and running away. She knows very well to play the system. I do not want to give out her name. But, I just want guys to realize she is a con and a cheat. She was married to me and she had multiple affairs, and till 4 days back I did not know she was married, and finally realized she was sleeping with another man and had no other choice that she had to respond me back and she had to open out the truth that she was remarried again. She has been marrying and leaving them ever year and finds another man. While being married with one man she goes around and cheats around and comes back.
I am just devastated and sitting down that I did not know that this women who said who had education and a therapist is conning people and breaking their hearts and destroying their life savings. I lost all my life’s savings with this women and she destroyed me,. my reputation in the society and also my relationship with my children. I am slowly restoring everything back to normal. I loved this women so much that I kept on forgiving her and taking her back even after she was cheating on me several times, and finally figured out that she has been married and still she was playing me and trying to see me.
Beware people of this women. This is her nth affair and marriage. Do not know what all she has hidden and she runs from one state to another state and now finally living there for sometime now.
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Ox Drover says:
Dear Avictim,
I am so sorry that you were scammed by this woman, but do not be too hard on yourself about it….lots of smart people have been scammed by con men/women, and you are not the first and won’t be the last.
They pretend to be all kinds of things in education and in jobs.
If she has a license as a therapist (she may not) you can contact the state licensing board and report her for “unprofessional conduct” (were you are former patient of hers?) does she practice therapy without a license? that is illegal!
Contact whatever agency over sees professional conduct of her “profession” and see if you can’t get her outed like that.
Get documentation to prove what you say is true, marriage licenses and divorce papers are PUBLIC RECORDS. You can also probably get a private investigator to get copies of these records or to tell you where they are and how to go about getting them for only a few hundred dollars (2 or 300$) in the US.
Stick around here at love fraud and read the articles in the archives and LEARN ABOUT THESE MONSTERS and also learn about healing your own wounds. There is lots of suport here and lots of knowledge for healing.
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shabbychic says:
avictim, sorry to read what you went through. It takes time to heal from something so heartbreaking… and the biggest shock is realizing there are so many evil people running around scamming good, decent, compassionate, loving NORMAL people (like us!). Hope you will keep posting and reading the articles, it helps a lot!!!!
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one_step_at_a_time says:
avictim – i encourage you to do as Oxy suggests if it is something that you are emotionally capable of. given that her profession is regulated, you do have some recourse.
it is very important to take care with your heart – you have been through a lot, and have done the right thing for yourself. you post sounds like the shock is wearing off, and you will feel more and it will be more emotionally difficult for a while. hang out here, and read and post. The people here will help.
and just to let you know – Donna asks that we don’t post the names of our spaths here.
take care.
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avictim says:
She lies to the system also and gets her license. Her license was suspended in another state, and she moved to the new state and she tried to say all kinds of things and got her license back. I do not know, and moreover I am not sure how far her education is valid. I think, I believed all that but unfortunately, not sure how far it is true.
She knew that I was fast to pickup and the ways she was behaving was like a prostitute, so I was in doubt, and I think that made her realize that she could not cheat me anymore,. But, she moved out of me and for the last 1 year she has still been playing with my mind making me believe that she still loves me and I was believing that she would have stopped her alcohol and she would have changed to be a better person. Even, though I divorced, her since I loved her so much I wanted to be back with her if she was a completely changed person. But, unfortunately, she made me believe she was single but finally she got caught and sends me a picture saying I am married. I was in shock? How can a women who said she loved me 2 years back suddenly thinks that there was nothing, where I am still dwelling in the hurt and pain.
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one_step_at_a_time says:
avictim – they do this all the time, it IS what they do.
please read a lot of the articles here, it will help you to understand. the other thing to do, to really understand, is to stay away from her – don’t have any contact with her. it will clear your mind of the confusion. if you have contact with her you will remain confused.
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Ox Drover says:
Dear Avictim,
Yes, they keep us on the hook with lies, trying to make us think it has some how been a “mistake” on our parts or we didn’T understand. ANY CONTACT with her will keep you in pain.
There are many articles here to help you understand how she she can lie and do what she does. She has no conscience. She does not regret what she has done. SHE IS A LIE, as well as a LIAR.
Are you in the US? If you are, I would still contact the licensing agency which over sees her license, and just tell them that you think her education is a fraud and tell them the name of the state where she lost her license and for what reason she lost it if you know. It might get them to investigate at least. They will NOT investigate unless someone complains. You don’t even have to tell them your name if you are afraid of her.
Block her phone calls, do not talk to her, or message her in any way and don’t even go to face book or read about her. Stay as far away from anything to do with her as you are able. God bless.
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avictim says:
Thank you Ox. Well, this women is such a Con she has not paid her federal student loan, she has not paid taxes, She will get food stamps when she is working and she used to use that when she was living with me to buy groceries and spend her money in what she wanted to spend it on. Then ask me money that she wants for this, wants for that. I was deeply in love with her and she was playing with my mind and keeping on tormenting me.
I am in the US. I think this next man she has married is an elderly man, and I think she knows that he has some money, so her intention is to marry someone and divorce them and take half of their money and walk away to the next guy. This women who says she has a PHD and I have not seen her PHD at all, I think it is from a Shady University in St. Kitts. But she has done her masters in Alabama University. But, I am still not sure as all these are fraud degrees or not. Because, they do background checks and I am not sure how she manipulates the system and gets job. Moreover, she does not last in one job for more than 6 months, and she either loses it or they fire her, because she misuses their own telephones, cell phones for her personal use and most of the time she is emailing different men and giving her office numbers to different men asking them to call her as she would not talk to them after hours. Because when she was married to me, she used to do the same thing and she will lie all the time she is going here, going there etc…but never knew that she must be going to meet different men.
I believed everything that this women was telling, lost my life;s savings which I could have used for my children and their education, or for their wedding. But, she ripped me off, she and her daughter put me in debt that has taken me 4 years to pay off selling my retirement funds. Moreover, she is smart where she does not use your credit card, instead she makes u buy it and she will say I will pay for it, or pay half of whatever loans we have. That is how she manipulated me, and I did believe as I was innocent and was looking for a life time partner and not a con artist.
After I came to know that this women has had a man next to her in bed all this while and still was lying to me, now finally have come to my senses. I have more details about her other than all this con stuff she has done. I think she and her ex husband both are involved in this and both are doing this. Infact, he tells her or helps her out when she gets into trouble and protects her. This is how they both are doing things.
She was ripped off her license from GA state and she never gave the medical records to her patients and ran away from GA. They finally told her that the medical records need to be shredded and I don;t think so she has shredded it. Then she finally manipulated the system and got her KY license. Now, she has been without a job for a year after she was fired in her last job. So, she did not have anyone to pay for her bills and rent, so she hooked on to this guy last year and she brought this guy as a mover to move her stuff from my house, but now I realize that he was not her mover but her lover who was moving her things. This is the same guy whom she has married and she was with this guy and she was also trying to meet me couple of times after our divorce and wanted to get back again, but I never showed any kind of signs that I was going to get back with her. And now after being married to this guy, she has been sending pictures of hers to me and trying to say how she is looking now and she has left alcohol and she does not drink etc… I thought she was a changed women, but never knew that she would stoop so low.
Moreover, if she is married to someone elderly, then she can get his money and also go about meeting other men, as he will not be able to keep up to her and she might lie anything to him to say that I have to go for work here, there etc… And, he will be there thinking that she is a professional and she will have work etc.. So, this must be a good catch for her as she can go about doing what she needs to do and she can have a guy back home who can pay her bills and provide her whatever she needs.
Just in hurt and pain knowing the fact that you sincerely love someone and this women has taken my good nature and heart and ripped it apart. I just want people to be aware of this women has she has gone from one state to another state and she has gone around from east coast to west coast with different men sleeping around. She is dangerous and could spread disease. She will sweet talk to anyone and everyone as long as she gets what she wants. She will never stop. She hails from the capital of KY.
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avictim says:
I think she goes around marrying one guy after the other guy so that somewhere during her lifetime, if someone dies, she can go after their inheritance and get money of it. This women is a fraud. She has been with several men and please be careful as she has disease and spreads around from one man to another. I was lucky enough to get my test clean and I think it is only a miracle and gods blessings that I am there without anything that affected me. I did not even know that she was married long time back as she used to come and see me, and sleep with me. This women is dangerous people, Please, Please, she has ripped off many men and she has even caused pain to a father whom she made lose his child custody and manipulated the system. He has been calling me to find out about her whereabouts but till this day I did not tell him, but now I decided I should call this man and tell him.
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one_step_at_a_time says:
avictim – I would send him an anonymous message. be careful of getting involved. it is important to warn and help where you can, but you also have to be aware that most spaths launch smear campaigns that could blindside you. so be careful of how you do it.
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Ox Drover says:
Dear Avictim,
Why is he wanting to know her whereabouts? If he is wanting to get back with her, I would NOT give him contact information on her.
In fact, unless he is turning her in to the law for fraud, I think he is better off not knowing where she is.
I would also caution you too, that most people these people con are not interested in being warned and will not believe you. The only way I think you could stop part of her cons is to contact the professional boards and tell them what you have said here, and then they will do their own investigation and see if they can find out the truth of her licenses.
Sometimes the cons are so “good” at what they do that it is NOT “ILLEGAL” to do what they do, to talk you into giving them money, though of course it IS IMMORAL and WRONG to do that, but the law doesn’t punish wrong things, only illegal things and they are not always the same things.
I suggest that you just read here and learn as much as you can about how psychopaths operate, and work on healing yourself. It takes time and we feel “emotionally raped” as well as financially taken, so it will take TIME and work, but you dont’ have to let this woman ruin your life forever. God bless you.
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avictim says:
Thanks Ox and the others. It has been two weeks and I blocked her email and also I have no contacts with her neither from my side or her side. I am emotional, but I will get through it.
Well the person who is trying to find her is because she messed up his child custody case as she was handling his ex;s child custody and did something so that he could not see his child. He found out that she was living here, and send several notices and I told her about it. By then she left me and went away. Recently, he called me and asked me where she was and I said she has left 2 years back and I do not know her whereabouts. After that I do not know, I am just going about my business dealing with this pain and suffering.
I will get through it, as I have gotten through several of life;s difficulties and this is one of them. I think the lord is testing me my faith towards him and he is telling me something that I should do for him, but I am failing to do. So, let me ask god to direct my path and lead it.
I have been a good faithful child and have lived as a good christian, a good husband and a good person, but life takes its own turns.
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Ox Drover says:
Dear a FORMER VICTIM, you need to change your mind set and put that “former” part in there….you are no longer her victim, you are RECOVERING now. That may seem silly, but words matter to how we think about things, and even ourselves.
Tonight is the last night of 2010, and we get a new chance to make the next year better, to be happier and more at peace. Take a positive look at the things you can do to make that happen. Success is 90% sweat and 10% good fortune…Stay in there and keep educating yourself! Knowledge is power, and power is freedom! Spend time alone, spend time with your faith, you will find the***** right path! ****your path!!!! Happy New Year!
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skylar says:
I saw in the comments that you all were making fun of her adams apple, but what about the 5 o’clock shadow?
sheesh!
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soimnotthecrazee1 says:
THERE SHE IS!!!!!! Ox. we peeps were concerned about you on another thread. Hope all is well weather wise on your farm
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Ox Drover says:
You guys had waaaay too much fun with your “wee drams” last night, don’t think you can get one over on me!!!!! I’m like santa claus I can see you when your sleeping, I can see you when you’re awake—so you better be good or Oxy’s gonna get her skillet! LOL
I played board games with my son and his friends, and they drank wine and I had a “little tiny wee dram” me self (actually 1 drink) and we went to bed well before the new year so we could get up and the weather has become cooler than they had predicted, so we will go ahead and do two of the three animals we had planned to butcher this weekend…so I may be so tired tonight I don’t even have the energy to say good night! But I won’t have to ride the stationary bike for exercise. Ha ha
Well, you guys keep it between the ditches and all of you start out the new year with black eyed peas, hog jowl and corn bread for good luck!!!! This is going to be a P-FREE NEW YEAR FOR US ALL!!!!!!
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soimnotthecrazee1 says:
Thanks Ox!!! Yes, I finally have a full understanding of what happened to me and my fairytale! It feels good starting the new year off with this knowledge! It’s like I can leave alot of baggage in last year and move forward. Thanks!
Soimnotthecrazee1!
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Ox Drover says:
Well it only took us two hours for the first half of our process and are getting ready for the second one. I’ve got the easy job while the guys are outside getting ready for the next one—I’m making a pot of coffee to fill their thermos—those guys run on COFFEE! Weather is perfect! Will be 21 tonight to chill out the carcasses and high of 45 tomorrow, perfect for cutting and packaging the meat. Everything has gone just lovely (at least from OUR perspective) The “guests of honor” have not complained so far, the one looks a bit naked without his hide though and the other one isn’t aware she is on the guest list.
The one young man who has never done this before keeps saying “OH, COOL!!!!”
You know, it is not how hard or how “nasty” the job is, if the people working together to do it have good attitudes and are doing their best to help each other accomplish a task, it is actually FUN! Skinning and gutting a cow isn’t exactly my most favorite thing in the world to do, and it is one of those jobs that must be done under pretty cool conditions, and there’s no way you are not going to get slimed with something, and most of the time I will cut myself at least once, but I am actually enjoying the day today and a hot bath tonight will feel so wonderful! Supper is already cooked and the guys will probably beat me to death in the board games tonight, like they did last night (NO mercy for an old lady, NONE AT ALL!) and I can’t think of a better New Year’s day celebration that I’ve ever had or probably ever will, just for the pure PEACE AND JOY and feeling loved and happy.
The Good Lord has provided plenty for me, and enough to share. Good friends, a home in which I am warm and well fed…and you know, that makes me one of the most wealthy individuals in the entire world. I can sit here and think about how MISERABLE I WAS on this same date last year after the row with my son when he lied to me, I was TOTALLY DEVASTATED and miserable…but now I have worked through the situation, and really there isn’t anything that has changed except MY ATTITUDE. But, that was ALL THAT NEEDED TO CHANGE. It was also ALL I COULD CHANGE. I can’t change what he does, or how he acts, but I sure as heck can CHANGE HOW I RESPOND TO IT.
My life is what I make of it, and that’s the take home lesson for 2010, that will make 2011 A MUCH BETTER YEAR ***NO MATTER WHAT OTHERS DO**** I am not going to let other’s behaviors make or break my life. What a difference a year makes.
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flowerpower says:
Ox-
I am living vicariously thru you, frontier woman.
So glad I read this, cuz I forgot the peas and cornbread …until now. Going to the store! Happy new year.
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