I, Psychopath: Watch the documentary online
PDF Three years ago, on November 30, 2006, I received an e-mail from Sam Vaknin, Ph.D.
Perhaps you’ve seen Vaknin’s name on the Internet. He wrote and self-published a book called Malignant Self-Love—Narcissism Revisited. He promotes the book heavily online, so if you Google “narcissism,” his website on narcissistic personality disorder comes up on the first page of search results.
Here’s what Vaknin said in his e-mail:
You haven’t responded to my last two e-mails to you. Have I done anything to offend you?
(puzzled)
Take care.
Sam Vaknin
Now, I didn’t remember seeing any e-mails from Sam Vaknin. So I wrote:
Sam,
What emails? I haven’t received anything.
Donna
His reply:
Dear Donna,
I much appreciate your response, thank you.
My e-mail messages to you are probably relegated by your e-mail program to your spam or trash folders.
I wrote to offer to collaborate with you in any way you deem fit. For instance, I can respond to questions about narcissism, or write a short monthly column about the intersection between narcissism and psychopathy.
Here is a list of links which you, the visitors to your Website, and the readers of your (great!) newsletter may find of interest.
His e-mail included 17 links for articles on his website, articles he’s written on other websites, and articles in which he was quoted. The guy seemed to know what he was talking about, so I invited him to send me an article to explain the difference between narcissists and psychopaths. He immediately sent another link to another one of his pages. I read the information and determined that it was poorly written and explained nothing.
So I looked into his background. Right on his homepage was a link to his disclaimer:
The author is NOT A MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. The author is certified in Psychological Counseling Techniques by Brainbench.
Brainbench was an organization that offers online business training and assessments. And his Ph.D., according to his own website, was in philosophy. Delving further into his website, I read his page about Narcissists and Women. Here’s what Vaknin wrote about himself:
I am atrabilious, infinitely pessimistic, bad-tempered, paranoid and sadistic in an absent-minded and indifferent manner. My daily routine is a rigmarole of threats, complaints, hurts, eruptions, moodiness and rage. I rail against slights true and imagined. I alienate people. I humiliate them because this is my only weapon against the humiliation of their indifference to me.
Sam Vaknin, it turned out, readily admitted that he was a narcissist. I decided not to publish any of his articles.
Sam, the movie
Now, Sam Vaknin is star of a documentary called I, Psychopath. The documentary followed Sam Vaknin and his wife, Lidija, as Vaknin was examined and tested by experts to determine if he is, indeed, a psychopath.
It is a world first. As we all know, psychopaths don’t think anything is wrong with them and so are unlikely to seek evaluation or treatment. The only ones who are examined are in prison. But Vaknin voluntarily submitted to the process, and it was captured on film.
We see Vaknin take a personality test and be interviewed for the PCL-R (SV) diagnostic tool. Then we see other experts examine his brain in an MRI machine.
Along the way, Vaknin offered some chilling insights. “Most psychopaths are more like poison than a knife,” he said. “And they are more like slow-working poison than cyanide.”
He also explained proper bullying technique—verbally attack, then back off. Attack, then back off. Eventually, he explained, the victim is done in by his or her own stress reactions.
The documentary also addresses Vaknin’s academic “credentials,” which are, not surprisingly, highly exaggerated. (For Vaknin’s response to questions about his qualifications, see his rant about “malicious gossip.”)
Attacking the filmmaker
The film was written and directed by Ian Walker of the Magic Real Picture Company in Australia. Walker offered a first-person narrative through much of the film, describing his observations of Vaknin’s behavior. “Making a movie with a psychopath,” Walker stated, “Is a little like poking a snake with a stick.”
Slowly, Vaknin turned his verbal abuse on Walker. According to the I, Psychopath web page, “By the end, Walker almost calls it quits on his own film rather than spend another day with its main subject.”
I can understand that. Looking back at my e-mail correspondence with Vaknin, I suspect that he never sent two initial e-mails that he claimed I failed to answer. The “have I done anything to offend you?” language was probably contrived to put me on the defensive right away. Classic psychopathic strategy.
If you want a good look at the behavior of a psychopath, and at research about the disorder, watch this documentary.
I, Psychopath on Top Documentary Films.
Thanks to a Lovefraud reader for sending the link for online viewing.
written by Donna Andersen • Permalink •
Rosa says:
Thank you, Henry.
The timing could not be more perfect, with the baby coming, and everything.
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ErinBrock says:
Rosa:
Triplets?
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OxDrover says:
Dear Henry,
I don’t blame you for your reply, but I would have suggested that me might come over to give you the copy of the movie of yours he lost, then when he handed it to you, slammed the door in his face.
Good for you though, no more “mr nice guy” to people who don’t deserve it and have shown you they don’t deserve it. The NERVE OF THE GUY! LOL
Oh, BTW, if you hear a loud scream coming from my direction it is my X friend showing up at the old storage warehouse and finding nothing left except wet cardboard boxes of wet books, and wet carboard boxes of wet and moldy clothing, and a huge old desk that is under a roof leak and is falling apart, a couple of file cabinets full of mouse nests in old papers, and a few other things of EQUAL VALUE and UTILITY. What a shame its all such a mess, I told him in March and April that the roof was leaking, that windows were broken, and he should get it out by June 1–which he assured me in april that he would do. (that’s the last time I heard from him by e mail, though the reason he said in his last e mail the other day that he didn’t contact me sooner was he had lost my phone number) LOL Maybe he should have quit waiting for my son D or me to volunteer to move it for him with my truck, my fuel and D’s labor. Golly, he should have made other arrangements to keep his stuff protected, dry and secure. No telling what happened to the stuff that was of any value. The local kids have used that old place as a spot to drink beer and smoke dope off and on for years.
Another reason he said in his e mail that he wasn’t able to contact us by phone is that son D hasn’t answered his phone or returned calls since January 15th, he did fail to mention in his e mail to me, though, that was the date he called and asked D for MORE money when he hadn’t paid back the money he borrowed to buy a car a couple of years ago. D said NO to his request for more money. Wonder if that is the reason D hasn’t been taking his calls? could be.
Isn’t it amazing how they just can’t understand why we might “still be mad” at them, actually, not mad so much as just not up for any more of their “games”—
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Rosa says:
ErinBrock:
Triplets….Cross your fingers for me!!!
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henry says:
morning smoxy – Believe me I thot about doing that or worse, I got so pissed at myself for falling for yet another con. I had to just chalk it up as experience. I hope you don’t get moldy in that wet barn.. moldy books are lethal be careful..
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OxDrover says:
What did I miss? Rosa, I thought you were already married, I also thought there was as much chance of you having a baby as me having one! What’s the deal here? I am out of the loop and we were all posting at the same time.
The last time I remember you beingi “preg” was at the time I was “preg”—big joke! What’s the deal LOL scratching head here! Love oxy
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Cat says:
Congratulations all the way around!
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ErinBrock says:
OMG….OXY’s preggers AGAIN!!!!!!
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Cat says:
Henry, we learn as we go. I understand the specialness of any movie that speaks to us and that makes us think. I DO like what Ox had to say. Slam the door? LOL OK, I’m starting to sound like one of them. I also get mad at myself when I fall for something like that after having done it a 1,000 times. I remind myself I’m still learning and hopefully will be for the rest of my life. Don’t beat yourself up.
Ox, I’m cracking up! I’ve been following your story on the storage shed and the games this one tried to play with you. I have this vision in my head of all this stuff covered in mold and mildew and nothing works. Hey, you did the right stuff and if he doesn’t like it, oh well. I agree that it’s not anger so much as just not being willing to participate in the games. Mine gets REALLY mad about that. When he does try to talk to me, it goes nowhere and the next thing I know, there’s a new nasty rumor popping up about me somewhere. Oh well!
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witsend says:
Rosa,
Are you kidding or are you for real?
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Rosa says:
OxDrover:
Isn’t life crazy???
It’s such a long story. After we have our babies
, I will explain it all to you when we take our ass ride cross country.
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Rosa says:
I am totally kidding right now!!!
The
‘s mean I am kidding.
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OxDrover says:
Okay, gang I will wait til the cross country ride on Fat Ass and Hairy Ass for you to explain! LOL
I’m done in there, Henry, except I have a guy hired to pull the exterior siding off and told him he can take anything else in there that he wants to. Yea I know mold can be bad, I’m allergic to just about any kind of mold, but got a great respirator filter with like hepta cartridges AND also charcoal filter, it is easier to breathe through than those paper masks (even the good ones) and it fits securely on your face, with a head strap kinid ofthen over the top of your head and around the back. Doesn’t fog up your glasses either. Only about $30 bucks and sure worth it. I got it for wearing for sanding things on the electric belt sander which thows out a fine dust (and some woods are toxic, but none of them are any good in your lungs anyway)
I’m getting so SAFETY conscious in my old ate it is awful! LOL Quit smoking, wear eye protection in the shop, respirator around mold etc. NC with all the psychopaths, and pack a gun and a skillet to boot! Oh, and I wear one of those velcro/elastic heavy back braces when I am lifting or bending, and “ortho” shoes—can’t think of anything else I might need to protect me unless it would be a “back up mirror” and a bell that rings—LOOK OUT, MOM’S BACKING UP! ROTFLMAO
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icanseeclearlynow says:
I very recently (i’ve been one month “free” of him) escaped from a sociopath, narcissist, psychopath, whatever you want to call IT, I prefer to call him the devil or demon, or snake because that’s more fitting to me. Maybe at some point in the distant future, I will get to a place of psychological strength to watch this vileness without vomiting all over the screen, but at the moment, it would send me into a state of near catatonic, nihilist inertia.
Pure evil, is all I can say and I’ve already been infused with enough of that!!!!!
I have PTSD and only rare sporadic moments of feeling ANY of the shining strength of my soul that has been nearly destroyed, so there is absolutely no way I could watch this right now. I’ve lived it and it nearly killed me.
I am so grateful for this site though. I have been coming back here almost daily since I found it, and appreciate the many excellent articles as well as resources and user comments that help me feel less alone with this and validate the indescribable devastation I feel.
Thank you very much
p.s. Oh, I am thankful for this article for the heads up on this snakes narcissism web site. It’s good to know the source and be forewarned. Thanks for that.
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henry says:
Rosa – Your attempt at humor is not funny this early in the day. You should wait till happy hour to pull that crap on us old feeble minded folks. I was scratchin my head too, wonderin ” dang what did I miss?’ anywho ox if you are wearing that ‘get up’ when the old guy shows up I doubt he will give you any problem…reminds me of my precious granddaughter – on thanks giving day she was wearing a cute pink ballarina outfit and carrying a sword..Towanda..~~!
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one_step_at_a_time says:
Oxy,
as i am getting old i htink the one VERY necessary safety devise that I am still resisting, is a bra.
and henry, I have that EXACT outfit!
one step
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Rosa says:
Henry:
It’s hard for me to stay up in the late night hours with you guys.
I am more perky in the morning.
I am in the process of putting up my Christmas tree.
Back to the lights. I hate doing the lights.
I like putting on the ornaments.
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OxDrover says:
Dear icanseeclearlynow,
I’m glad you are here, and I perfectly understand why you would not want to watch this slime bag on video. I don’t blame you at all. I haven’t seen it either, though I did see one short video clip of him, with his wife standing in the background like some sort of kicked dog. Even that short clip made me want to vomit.
Sam owns I think several sites that he touts his books and writes articles for these suvivor blogs like some sort of GURU. When I first logged on to one in the middle of my chaos and liaterally running for my life, the other bloggers were for the most part helpful and seemed to be caring, but the moderators were viscious if you mentioned anything about a spiritual walk, and I’m not talking about preaching to others, Iam simply saying like stating “I am a christian and that has helped me with my recovery” You would be WARNED and threatened with being banned. I was so out of it at the time, I didn’t realize that his site was not the only one in the world. DUH! But anyway, when it got really NASTY toward me, and also at the time Sam wrote an ARTICLE for the site “Proving” that Jesus was a Narcissist just like SAM! It didn’t stay up long after I was the one person who answered it—you can imagine what my answer was, but I did not stay around long enough to even know if the banned me or not, haven’t been back there since.
I haven’t even googled that slime bag’s name since either, but I am told by others that he owns several sites besides the one on MSN. I have also privately e mailed several folks I met on that blog (you used to could privately e mail each other but the moderators stopped that from being used so bloggers could not get in touch with each other or “talk about” the moderators’ flaming behaviors behind their backs) but anyway, several other survivors and I e mailed and they told me about other sites. I don’t even now remember where they were and wouldn’t go there any way. I am pretty picky about which sites I will even read, there is so much crap out there. Some good stuff too. As well as OTHER CON ARTISTS posing as “gurus” of healing for their own aggandizment and with about as phony a set of credentials and “exaggerated” CVs, some of them quite “prominent” on the internet. It is a shame, too, but just like Sam (althought these others don’t claim to BE one–I think he has the patent on that gig!) doesn’t keep them from exploiting victims.
BTW Henry, it is freaking NOON in our time zone, about time for you to WAKE your lazy arse up, don’t you think? LOL (tht’s cause I don’t know how to get the cute little emoticons to pop up!) ROTFLMAO
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slimone says:
Welcome Icanseeclearly, and congratulations on your month of freedom. The PTSD can get pretty intense in this early period, and I am glad you have found your way to lovefraud, as I know I have found this site REALLY helpful in keeping me grounded in reality, and feeling validated. Being validated is so important, so that we can stay with what is real, and out of the sick illusion that can drag at our hearts.
Again, welcome…much healing to you. Slim
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henry says:
Icanseeclearlynow – love the name you picked and the song. Welcome. My newest latest term for them is WORM SNAKES..please stick around and post and vent.
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ErinBrock says:
Henry:
I LOVE your G. daughter….
A pink ballerina suit and SWORD!!!!!
She’ll be okay in life!
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henry says:
Ox I wont give you the finger – but i have four fingers raised, it’s called a bouquet !!!!
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ErinBrock says:
Icanseeclearly:
Welcome and congrats on your ‘new vision’.
There is a lot of support here and great information.
Once the ‘blinders’ are off it’s amazing how ‘clearly we can see’.
Great name….and again….Welcome!
EB
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witsend says:
Rosa,
Love that humor girl…..Good luck with the lights. I usually test them all but end up with one set not working anyways by the time I am done and have to start over. Bah-humbug!
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ErinBrock says:
Rosa~enjoy your holiday spirit….
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OxDrover says:
Henry,you are a BAAAAAD BOY! BOINK!!!! Now you get out of your bathrobe it’s nearly 1 p.m. I’ve already finished cleaning my office this morning, and washing my sheets, and making my bed. Even washed the dogs other bed, cause when I told him to go get into his bed, he slunk back looking sheepish, so I told him again in a harsh tone of voice, only to get up when he didn’t mind, and realize the CAT was in his bed! LOL He couldn’t get in it, it isn’t big enough for her and him. Bless his heart since she’s come inside to live, shes taken over EVERYTHING that was HIS, including his bed.
How do you train a cat? ROTFLMAO
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icanseeclearlynow says:
Hi OxDrover,
Thanks for the welcome
All of this information is very good to know ahead of time and I’m grateful for that. So, thank you for sharing your experience and what to look out for. I have been doing some online reading as well and I’m extremely wary of any and all information/websites out there. That is part of the hyper-vigilance, I know, but it is also from a very important lesson I learned and that is the MO of the Ps. They know where to find the hosts (my word instead of victims) and they know all the carrots to dangle. I do not trust anything no matter how legit it looks and anything that sticks out like a red flag, I am outta there!!! The slow poison metaphor is a great one. To me anyway, absorbing ANY of the poison that comes from the Ps is detrimental, no matter how they want to dress it up..a snake is a snake and even so much as exposing myself to it, is not smart IMO.
Hi slimone,
Thanks for the congrats. Unfortunately, it took a vicious assault on me for me to finally get it and escape, but I did and that is the important thing
As for the PTSD it IS bad. I am a wreck. But at least I know why now and have the tools to get better. Yes, this site is helpful in always bringing me out of the sick illusion that drags at our hearts…good way to word it! Thanks for the warm welcome and kind words 
Hi henry,
“WORM SNAKES” ha I love it! I always liked that song too. When I had to pick a name it kind of came to me…it feels right. Thank you for the welcome
Hi ErinBrock,
Thanks for the welcome Erin. I like your name too
I suppose my username is quite apropo to the situation.
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henry says:
Ox I got up at the crack of 8, milked all my chickens and fed the goats. Been burning brush and raking leaves. I just cant resist popping in here now and then to give you something to do…bouquet for you again…..
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Twice Betrayed says:
Henry”:on thanks giving day she was wearing a cute pink ballarina outfit and carrying a sword”
This is just so cute! I am getting a visual on this!!!! Thanks for sharing that…I enjoyed it.
My little granddaughter [3 years old] wanted a bride outfit at Target–and wanted it on right then….so I got the whole outfit for her and took the tags and paid for it. Put it all on her and she walked over to the play tool aisle [in her veil, dress, high heels and jewelry]and got a jack hammer and started play drilling on the floor! It was an absolute scream! My daughter took her picture, posted it on her face book and titled it: “One of the wedding gifts!” ahahahahaaa!
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henry says:
cute~! TB my grand daughter goes golfing with her dad, she is 5 and she is actually pretty good at it..
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Twice Betrayed says:
Oxy: how to train a cat-whoa….I had a cat that was sick with an autoimmune disorder and had to remain inside the barn apt the rest of his life [he had been an outside barn kitty]. The vet said to put him on a leash and take him for a daily walk! [ I also had to bathe him twice weekly! I had to wear long protective gloves and it was a nightmare--how many have ever given a 16 lb cat a bath?! The first time I looked like I had been thru a paper shredder!] Anyway, this cat would NOT walk on a leash–he would just flop down and we had to drag him-so the joke was: Has anyone taken the cat for his daily drag?
*Sorry off topic….but just a little animal humor for a smile today. 
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Twice Betrayed says:
Hey Henry: She sounds like a cute little character! Thanks for the smiles!
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henry says:
My three Dachshunds can train a cat in 3 seconds..
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henry says:
speaking of golfing – how many think Wiger Tood’s is a jerk?
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Twice Betrayed says:
Henry: I do!!!!! I hear his wife gave him a good workover with his own golf clubs.
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amber says:
Henry!! You’re sooo right. The more reports that came out about the Tiger Wood’s thing, I knew something was suspicious. I told my sister a couple days ago before the news suspected it..he got caught cheating and his wife chased him and beat the crap out of him with his golf clubs. Why else would he be leaving his house at 2:30 in the morning on Thanksgiving. And please..as if she pulled him out from the back windows that she broke. She should have beat him more. Cheating piece of S#%*!!
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henry says:
even before this ‘car wreck’ I thot he was arrogant and narcish..i hope his wife get’s his ‘balls’ in the divorce
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witsend says:
IDK, the one thing I did respect about Tiger before was that he was pretty “boaring” as far as staying out of the press spotlight. He has said as much. That he lives a pretty low key private life and it wasn’t very exciting for the press to follow.
His private life WAS pretty low key up until now. LOL.
It is always interesting how people interpret things differently once the press gets ahold of the situation.
I wonder if his wife gave him a concussion (with his own golf clubs) and that is how he slammed into a fire hydrant (?) tree(?)….
My older son loves Tiger Woods. He is an avid golfer. I will have to pick his brain and see what he thinks about all of this.
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Stayingsane says:
I wonder would a psychopath make a good golfer? mmmh
So back to this ‘I psychopath’ movie and Sam.
Where it became interesting for me was when he became abusive, frustrated because things were not going his way
“you are an idiot. I do not punish you, you are inconsequential, I manipulate you into doing the film I want to do”
I saw the hunched over figure of the film maker as he said inconsequential and I felt the familiar chill…
.I really know how inconsequential I was to the P…it’s a chilling moment when you sense with every fibre of human being that this “person” really could not care less about you and you are merely a means to an end….Its when in shock, I played along with him, I was so scared he could actually obliterate me rather than face his wrong doings, I agreed and became mallable just so I could escape.
He called his wife…Mallable, thats’s what they need a blank slate to write on..yet she stays…(???!!!???)
The beauty of it is for me…I would rather die than end up with a guy like Sam. He is gut wrenchingly boring, loveless and unyielding.
His wife has been attracted and possibly addicted to his lack of empathy because she despises her own emotionality?? she is cynical about finding love and instead she found Sam….she has a robot like presence, Dr Spock logic and its clear too me she aspires to be more like him than the other way around….PLEASE LYDIA DO NOT HAVE A BABY WITH HIM
its educational. I think it’s important P’s get to be observed , filmed, interviewed and quintessentially nailed….so that we the general first hand experiencers of P’s can say in an opratic chorus “WE TOLD YOU SO” and as for Sam? who cares…..anyone?
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easp says:
Thank you once again Donna, for the post. It makes me even more
grateful that the sociopath/psychopath is out of my live.
my live is so much better, I am moving on and have the help of my dear friends to do that. I have learned that my friends of many years are the best thing. I am not interested in meeting another man, as I am having far more fun with my friends and family.
I have learned to to value my freedom and peace.
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OxDrover says:
Guys, guys, GUYS!!! The evidence is not all in yet, we don’t know if the glove fits! Makes me wonder though if the crash wasn’t caused by him swerving to miss her and he hit the tree and then she bashed on the “back window” to “get him out” LOL MEOOOOOOWWWW!!! We are starting to sound like a bunch of cats fighting! Besides, it isn’t right for her to pound on him with or without golf clubs, she should just be a lady and rip him for every dime he is worth! Then thumb her nose at him and marry her then-rich attorney—hey, MATT, WANNA JOB? Maybe you wouldn’t have to marry her, just take the job on contengency and get 40% of her settlement! ha ha
Yea, I’ve had calves I had to take for a drag behind the donkey or the tractor to teach them to lead. I thought one of them was going to wear her feet off to the knees dragging them straight out front like a balking donkey! Funny!
Thanks for the FLOWERS HENRY! I know you love me, but it isn’t even valentines day yet! ROTFLMAO you BAAAAD BOY!
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Twice Betrayed says:
Oxy: I read it in the National Enquirer so it must be true.
I don’t advocate violence buuuuut…..she let her emotions get the better of her…..she obviously loves him—I’ve been there….I can relate. I forgive her.
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OxDrover says:
Well, if beating someone about the head and shoulders with a golf club means she “obviously loves him” then I think we had better have a “heart to heart talk” Witsend…cause that means OJ was REALLY in love with Nichole!
Seriously, Unless she was DEFENDING herself I think she was out of line, and I don’t think chasing a car down with a golf club means she is handling things well, BUT we don’t know the entire story, and may not ever know the REAL TRUTH just the he said-she said part tht the Enquirer will publish.
I am suprised though that if they were having so much trouble he managed to keep it out of the press til now. I had actually never seen a photo of her before lately I happened to be watching the national news (I don’t watch the “star reports” as I could give a rat’s behind what most of those flakes are doing or who they are doing).
I have also “acted” out inappropriately when I was angry, but fortunately not to that extent and it sure didn’t make the national news, that is a good thing.
You know it is going to be a BAD DAY when the National Enquirer is on your door step, or at your gated entrance at least. LOL
Believe me when I tell you the NEWS MEDIA can be awful, and I won’t even go into how they hounded me when my husband was in the plane crash, it was the top story for the state that night. I even screamed at one reporter over the phone, “My husband just burned to death, are you some kind of sadist that you won’t leave me alone?”
When a truck crashed near here a few years ago and was on fire, the rescue workers were blasted by the prop wash of a news helicopter that hovered over the huge fire blowing the fire down on the rescue workers. The helicopter pilot lost his license and the news agency got their hand slapped. It was unbelieveable to me. STUPID. I can’t imagine what it must be like to be famous and live in the lime light with the press hounding you every minute.
All I can say is that if he is having an affair, I do have empathy for the wife and I do hope that she gets some help, because if she is that enraged, she does need some help. Maybe she will show up here when SHE WRITES THE BOOK! don’t you know that one will sell!?!
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Twice Betrayed says:
Oxy: I believe there is a difference between her reaction and OJ Simpson’s! I have been overcome by betrayal to the point of ‘losing control’ some but not to the point of OJ Simpson brutality!!!! I was broken hearted and seriously angered by the betrayal and very young at the time. While I did not connect with the plate I hurled I could have easily….
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Twice Betrayed says:
* I mean good heavens we cannot all just say: “Oh, dear, here he comes home to me…at whatever hour-I have our two kids…one less than a year old….and he has been in the news screwing around with some less than moral female—so I think I will just call a lawyer and neuter him financially. hmmmm….oh well. * we are enraged and dang well should be. I think things certainly got out of hand…but they were out of hand when he made that morally irresponsible decision. As I said before….I do not advocate violence and I don’t think this was the really correct way to handle it but I DO UNDERSTAND!
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witsend says:
Oxy,
I’m NOT the one who is throwing him to the wolves….I personally don’t know if she hit him with the clubs or not. That is the word out there. I was poking fun at the press not believing the hype…. It is all speculation at this point.
I really don’t like how people MAKE UP their own minds what happened. Without really knowing the facts…
AND by God if you read it in the national enquirer that doesn’t mean it is true! THEY PAY for stories. That is “encouragement” for people to make up stuff.
I have just read that the woman who he is supposidly having the affair with has made a statement that it is untrue. But this isn’t national news yet because it isn’t as much fun as speculation to the press.
I think the press sucks when they specualte what happened. They should be reporting FACTS but there is more $$$ in hype stories.
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Twice Betrayed says:
I believe most everyone took this way out of the intended context. It started as a light joke and just got blown way out there. The comment on the National Enquirer was a joke…note the smiley face. I was only saying if all this is true-then I could relate to her overwhelming emotions. I will no longer contribute to this…it’s become hostile and nonproductive. If anything I said was misunderstood or misconstrued…my apologies.
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witsend says:
Twicebetrayed,
I am sorry my comment about the National E. was not directed at you….I really hope you didn’t think I was singling you out. I didn’t EVEN realize that YOU had commented on the National E…..I had just finished reading an article about the woman who supposidly had the affair with him and her statement and she was “trashing” the National E.
My remark (about the paper) was in referance to her statement.
I certainly wouldn’t want you to think it was directed at you….Sorry
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OxDrover says:
Dear Wits, I also was kidding as well, but got to the point where I said, “seriously” about the hitting him with the clubs, IF she did it, the thing is that unless someone is really in danger I don’t think they should physically strike out, my conclusion was about her “acting like a lady” and taking all his money and then “marrying ” the attorney, and then asked if Matt wanted the job…but he might be able to NOT marry her. Since Matt is gay, and an attorney, I thiought it would be obvious I was kidding about THAT too.
Holpe I didn’t offend you, no offense intetnded. Peace. ((hugs))) And yes, the “new” is more often MADE than reported.
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JaneSmith says:
I’m almost positive that it was the adorable, lovable Henry who recommended the book by Lundy Bancroft, “Why does he do that? Inside the minds of angry and controlling men.”
Thank you so much, Mr. Sweety for suggesting this book. It is by far one of the most informative readings on the subject of abusive men. I’m more than half way through reading it but I’ve already learned so darn much.
I have to put it down sometimes and switch to my beloved Sci-Fi, Fantasy adventure because the content, the recorded comments of the abusive men and their partners elicits some mighty fury in me. On a personal level, of course, but from a compassionate viewpoint directed to the victimized women.
I consider it a must read for all of us who have had the misfortune of loving and caring for abusive, controlling mates.
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