Comments on: Risk Assessment for Violence, Playing the Odds http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/ Wake up to the danger of sociopaths Fri, 19 Mar 2010 11:57:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 hourly 1 By: Healing Heart http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23373 Healing Heart Mon, 12 Jan 2009 14:25:45 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23373 It's very frustrating that these guys can be in positions in power. When we all become more aware and evolved as a community, we will recognize who these people are, and will not promote/appoint/elect them. I believe that day is not so far off. We are part of an awakening - personally and globally It’s very frustrating that these guys can be in positions in power. When we all become more aware and evolved as a community, we will recognize who these people are, and will not promote/appoint/elect them. I believe that day is not so far off. We are part of an awakening – personally and globally

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]]> By: Wini http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23349 Wini Mon, 12 Jan 2009 07:31:27 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23349 Matt: My bosses played so many games with the seven of us that filed suits against them. 5 of the 7 were illegally fired or not allowed to come back into work. One co-worker was illegally fired for collapsing on the floor in tears over all the abuse she took for years from these animals ... another was illegally fired for slapping his hand on the conference table while he was explaining he did not do what they accused him of ... a defense reaction to their obscene set ups against this person. Well, needless to say, his slamming his hand down on the conference table was considered threatening and he was fired within minutes of doing so. My first kangaroo hearing ... the monitor (another slime ball) kept looking at his watch and saying to me "look how long we are giving you Wini". Of course, I had no clue what so ever what he was referring to. This went on all morning until late in the afternoon. They finally broke the hearing up for another day. During that day, I must have heard this monitor say while looking at his watch "look how long we are giving you Wini, no one has ever been given this much time". Later that evening while I was home it dawned on me what he meant by telling me and looking at his watch "look how long we are giving you Wini" was that most people would insult them or raise their voice towards them by telling them off for the disgusting way they were being treated ... so they usually get people to react ... then of course, get them fired on insubordination for reacting. These bosses and their cronies, the hearing officers, personnel officers and affirmative action officers were a well oiled, vicious machine ... who got their way every time with people they wanted out of the way. You would think they paid our salaries? Sick. Sick. Sick. Peace. Matt: My bosses played so many games with the seven of us that filed suits against them. 5 of the 7 were illegally fired or not allowed to come back into work. One co-worker was illegally fired for collapsing on the floor in tears over all the abuse she took for years from these animals … another was illegally fired for slapping his hand on the conference table while he was explaining he did not do what they accused him of … a defense reaction to their obscene set ups against this person. Well, needless to say, his slamming his hand down on the conference table was considered threatening and he was fired within minutes of doing so. My first kangaroo hearing … the monitor (another slime ball) kept looking at his watch and saying to me “look how long we are giving you Wini”. Of course, I had no clue what so ever what he was referring to. This went on all morning until late in the afternoon. They finally broke the hearing up for another day. During that day, I must have heard this monitor say while looking at his watch “look how long we are giving you Wini, no one has ever been given this much time”.

Later that evening while I was home it dawned on me what he meant by telling me and looking at his watch “look how long we are giving you Wini” was that most people would insult them or raise their voice towards them by telling them off for the disgusting way they were being treated … so they usually get people to react … then of course, get them fired on insubordination for reacting.

These bosses and their cronies, the hearing officers, personnel officers and affirmative action officers were a well oiled, vicious machine … who got their way every time with people they wanted out of the way. You would think they paid our salaries? Sick. Sick. Sick.

Peace.

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]]> By: Matt http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23318 Matt Mon, 12 Jan 2009 00:59:04 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23318 Wini: Your "boot camp" is actually not a bad form of conditioning. Any litigaor will tell you that as awful as depositions are, the whole point is to get a witness conditioned. And when you are on the receiving end, well... As a lawyer who has been on both sides of the rail -- both as an attorney and as someone who has been sued (not malpractice, but where I was personally sued when I foolishly guaranteed loans for a conman brother) I agree that there's a lot that I don't like about our so-called system of justice. On the other hand, having been asked to consult for countries which are developing justice systems after having thrown off dictatorships/totalitarian systems of government, there is a lot to be said for our system. The words "innocent until proven guilty"; and "everyone is entitled to their day in court" actually do mean something in our country. Or, as I often say, our founding fathers didn't put those words in our Constitution because they sounded nice. Wini:

Your “boot camp” is actually not a bad form of conditioning. Any litigaor will tell you that as awful as depositions are, the whole point is to get a witness conditioned. And when you are on the receiving end, well…

As a lawyer who has been on both sides of the rail — both as an attorney and as someone who has been sued (not malpractice, but where I was personally sued when I foolishly guaranteed loans for a conman brother) I agree that there’s a lot that I don’t like about our so-called system of justice. On the other hand, having been asked to consult for countries which are developing justice systems after having thrown off dictatorships/totalitarian systems of government, there is a lot to be said for our system. The words “innocent until proven guilty”; and “everyone is entitled to their day in court” actually do mean something in our country. Or, as I often say, our founding fathers didn’t put those words in our Constitution because they sounded nice.

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]]> By: Wini http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23309 Wini Mon, 12 Jan 2009 00:13:28 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23309 Matt: I practice for a year or so ... having my fiance or friend/family verbally insult me or talk down to me, or ask me a question and then cut me off when I tried to give my answer. I was conditioning myself to take anything as it came at me so I wouldn't come unglued or cry (out of shock) in the kangaroo courts at work or when the attorneys deposed me. I don't know what would have happened during the deposition, but I would have been fired if I cried at work ... my bosses wanted to claim that I was unstable and always cried at work. Anyway, practicing being insulted or talked down to toughened (or conditioned) me up so I wouldn't come unglued because I knew they were doing everything to make me come unglued or loose my cool. I was able to keep my composure ... especially when someone cuts your answer off and talks over you ... like you are not even in the conversation. Even when a personnel officer said to me in a kangaroo meeting "Is this why you started all this Wini, because your mother is DEAD!". The only thing that came in my mind when that was said to me was my parents voices saying "Wini, they weren't lucky enough to have parents like us". Nice folks I worked with. This is also what your tax dollars go to. Millions of tax dollars were wasted trying to get 7 of us who knew our bosses and their cronies were anti-social. If they could waste millions on us, guess how many more millions are wasted in the other 49 states? Peace. Matt: I practice for a year or so … having my fiance or friend/family verbally insult me or talk down to me, or ask me a question and then cut me off when I tried to give my answer.

I was conditioning myself to take anything as it came at me so I wouldn’t come unglued or cry (out of shock) in the kangaroo courts at work or when the attorneys deposed me. I don’t know what would have happened during the deposition, but I would have been fired if I cried at work … my bosses wanted to claim that I was unstable and always cried at work. Anyway, practicing being insulted or talked down to toughened (or conditioned) me up so I wouldn’t come unglued because I knew they were doing everything to make me come unglued or loose my cool. I was able to keep my composure … especially when someone cuts your answer off and talks over you … like you are not even in the conversation. Even when a personnel officer said to me in a kangaroo meeting “Is this why you started all this Wini, because your mother is DEAD!”. The only thing that came in my mind when that was said to me was my parents voices saying “Wini, they weren’t lucky enough to have parents like us”.

Nice folks I worked with.

This is also what your tax dollars go to. Millions of tax dollars were wasted trying to get 7 of us who knew our bosses and their cronies were anti-social. If they could waste millions on us, guess how many more millions are wasted in the other 49 states?

Peace.

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]]> By: Matt http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23302 Matt Sun, 11 Jan 2009 22:38:35 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23302 alohatraveler: You're right about not telling long stories in court. Be it criminal or civil matters "anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law" is the code to operate by. Or put another way, you can and will be hanged by your own words. I know Muldoon is based in GB. While I can't speak to how courts there operate, I have a pretty good suspicion that the judge involved in her case probably won't even accept an article saying "this is what I've been dealing with." The most likely scenario is that the court is going to (a) demand specifics from her and (b) order psychiatric examinations of both him and her, if custody is an issue, and him, if criminal charges are brought against him. The problem, as anybody who has dealt with an S knows, is they are so damned good at conning the legal and psychiatric systems. You are absolutely correct in your advice that she has to remain completely calm and not get hysterical and their objective is to paint her as unstable. My advice in this instance is for Muldoon to view this as giving a performance--strip all the emotion out of it, and to quote Sargent Joe Friday on the old "Dragnet" TV show, give "Just the facts, ma'am, just the facts." alohatraveler:

You’re right about not telling long stories in court. Be it criminal or civil matters “anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law” is the code to operate by. Or put another way, you can and will be hanged by your own words.

I know Muldoon is based in GB. While I can’t speak to how courts there operate, I have a pretty good suspicion that the judge involved in her case probably won’t even accept an article saying “this is what I’ve been dealing with.” The most likely scenario is that the court is going to (a) demand specifics from her and (b) order psychiatric examinations of both him and her, if custody is an issue, and him, if criminal charges are brought against him. The problem, as anybody who has dealt with an S knows, is they are so damned good at conning the legal and psychiatric systems.

You are absolutely correct in your advice that she has to remain completely calm and not get hysterical and their objective is to paint her as unstable. My advice in this instance is for Muldoon to view this as giving a performance–strip all the emotion out of it, and to quote Sargent Joe Friday on the old “Dragnet” TV show, give “Just the facts, ma’am, just the facts.”

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]]> By: alohatraveler http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23298 alohatraveler Sun, 11 Jan 2009 22:11:09 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23298 Muldoon, I love the advice Elizabeth gave you about boring him to death. PERFECT. It can be so painful when they spin bizarre stories about us. Anyone that believes their stories is being played like a puppet. Bad Man once sent me an email that said, "MY FRIENDS want to know how many restraining orders your exboyfriends have on YOU!" If they said that, I can only imagine what he said to them to get them to say that. The truth is, he didn't have any real friends.. just co-workers that were trapped on the boat with him for a few hours. There were a few people that thought he was okay but he couldn't hide that he was a nut job for too long. The last woman he claimed was his friend eventually told him, "You need help. Don't contact me again." Anyway.. there are some articles here but I can't remember which ones. Ask Donna. She might know better which ones would help a judge to understand. I would refrain from telling long stories in court. I would just say, "Here judge.. this is what I think I am dealing with." then hand over an article with a few highlighted parts. Remain completely calm in court and don't get hysterical. I know it's easy for me to say because I didn't have to go to court against the bad man... but remember your ex is going to try to paint you as unstable so you want to be the pilar of stability. Remember when OZ was controlling everything and Dorthy was afraid of OZ and then wasn't it TOTO that pulled the curtain back and OZ got all flustered and looked like an idiot. That's what you want to happen. Don't be afraid... he's gig will eventually come down around him. Good luck Muldoon. Muldoon,

I love the advice Elizabeth gave you about boring him to death. PERFECT.

It can be so painful when they spin bizarre stories about us. Anyone that believes their stories is being played like a puppet. Bad Man once sent me an email that said, “MY FRIENDS want to know how many restraining orders your exboyfriends have on YOU!” If they said that, I can only imagine what he said to them to get them to say that. The truth is, he didn’t have any real friends.. just co-workers that were trapped on the boat with him for a few hours.

There were a few people that thought he was okay but he couldn’t hide that he was a nut job for too long. The last woman he claimed was his friend eventually told him, “You need help. Don’t contact me again.”

Anyway.. there are some articles here but I can’t remember which ones. Ask Donna. She might know better which ones would help a judge to understand. I would refrain from telling long stories in court. I would just say, “Here judge.. this is what I think I am dealing with.” then hand over an article with a few highlighted parts. Remain completely calm in court and don’t get hysterical. I know it’s easy for me to say because I didn’t have to go to court against the bad man… but remember your ex is going to try to paint you as unstable so you want to be the pilar of stability. Remember when OZ was controlling everything and Dorthy was afraid of OZ and then wasn’t it TOTO that pulled the curtain back and OZ got all flustered and looked like an idiot. That’s what you want to happen. Don’t be afraid… he’s gig will eventually come down around him.

Good luck Muldoon.

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]]> By: OxDrover http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23270 OxDrover Sun, 11 Jan 2009 19:16:10 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23270 Dear Muldoon, Another one of his "ploys" to suck you in and make you want to interact with him....pretend he doesn't know you. Don't fall for it. Just Pretend you dont' know him either and keep on moving. LOL They are so predictable, and also changable too, they will try one thing one minute and then something else the next, so stay on your guard, sweetie! Don't let him catch you off guard or alone and hurt you. Keep on reading here and learning about psychopaths, though each varies a bit from the others and osme are more dangerous physicalloy than others, they all play by the same "Playbook" and few if any are original. I am keeping oyu in my prayers and thoughts, Muldoon, you are doing so well, and I am so glad for you that you and your kiddies are getting away from this man. I know it will be a hard difficult road to be a single parent to children who have been exposed to the likes of him from birth, but you can do it!!! I know you can!!! (((hugs)))) Dear Muldoon,

Another one of his “ploys” to suck you in and make you want to interact with him….pretend he doesn’t know you. Don’t fall for it. Just Pretend you dont’ know him either and keep on moving. LOL They are so predictable, and also changable too, they will try one thing one minute and then something else the next, so stay on your guard, sweetie! Don’t let him catch you off guard or alone and hurt you.

Keep on reading here and learning about psychopaths, though each varies a bit from the others and osme are more dangerous physicalloy than others, they all play by the same “Playbook” and few if any are original.

I am keeping oyu in my prayers and thoughts, Muldoon, you are doing so well, and I am so glad for you that you and your kiddies are getting away from this man. I know it will be a hard difficult road to be a single parent to children who have been exposed to the likes of him from birth, but you can do it!!! I know you can!!! (((hugs))))

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]]> By: muldoon http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23258 muldoon Sun, 11 Jan 2009 16:41:05 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23258 Have passed him today....as if he never seen me before.... Have passed him today….as if he never seen me before….

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]]> By: henry http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23241 henry Sun, 11 Jan 2009 05:26:54 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23241 'sanctuary trauma' yes, just one more trauma I have overcame. ’sanctuary trauma’ yes, just one more trauma I have overcame.

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]]> By: OxDrover http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/comment-page-3/#comment-23239 OxDrover Sun, 11 Jan 2009 04:50:36 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/12/06/risk-assessment-for-violence-playing-the-odds/#comment-23239 Henry, if M won the lotto and bought a mansion, it would still be a "crash pad" and he would still be "trailer trash"---your house would be a HOME if you lived in a card board box on a street corner. When I lived in the RV trailer last year it was my HOME even though it was only 33 ft long and 11 ft wide at the slide out. I've thought about that and I think that is why it took me another six months to move back into the house after I got back to the farm. Logically, it doesn't make sense to live in a 33 ft trailer parked next to a 4 bedroom house when you have a choice, but I felt safe iin my trailer HOME. Now I feel safe in the house (my HOME) again but I won't sell the trailer as long as my son lives....it is parked there in case I need it, ready to GO if I need to. I did began to wonder though if I would EVER feel safe in the house again. I read somewhere that it is called "sanctuary trauma" and that our sanctuary is traumatized and we feel we have no safety in our sanctuary. I'm not sure my son will ever be able to move back into his house again. He will be starting therapy for the PTSD with the same therapist I used and I hope it can make him feel safe again. His hypervigilence is decreasing since he has been home, and he's working very hard on it and his healing. He doesn't exhibit that "long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs" anxiety and hyperness that he did. LOL Goo'nite you guys! Love and have a good nite! Oxy Henry, if M won the lotto and bought a mansion, it would still be a “crash pad” and he would still be “trailer trash”—your house would be a HOME if you lived in a card board box on a street corner. When I lived in the RV trailer last year it was my HOME even though it was only 33 ft long and 11 ft wide at the slide out. I’ve thought about that and I think that is why it took me another six months to move back into the house after I got back to the farm.

Logically, it doesn’t make sense to live in a 33 ft trailer parked next to a 4 bedroom house when you have a choice, but I felt safe iin my trailer HOME. Now I feel safe in the house (my HOME) again but I won’t sell the trailer as long as my son lives….it is parked there in case I need it, ready to GO if I need to.

I did began to wonder though if I would EVER feel safe in the house again. I read somewhere that it is called “sanctuary trauma” and that our sanctuary is traumatized and we feel we have no safety in our sanctuary. I’m not sure my son will ever be able to move back into his house again. He will be starting therapy for the PTSD with the same therapist I used and I hope it can make him feel safe again. His hypervigilence is decreasing since he has been home, and he’s working very hard on it and his healing.

He doesn’t exhibit that “long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs” anxiety and hyperness that he did. LOL

Goo’nite you guys! Love and have a good nite! Oxy

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