Comments on: After the sociopath. Time passes. Love heals. http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/ Wake up to the danger of sociopaths Wed, 08 Feb 2012 07:17:13 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: duped http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-912 duped Sun, 09 Sep 2007 13:54:02 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-912 Ten months since I had him legally removed from the house. Only eleven months of marriage but I can't even begin to feel longing for male companionship. No contact...NOT an option with a child born to us both. The law gives him rights...to use his child to get at me! My strength and awareness of him and what he is, my only defense. Sometimes I forget and act myself...a luxury I do not have. So I must remember, replay the abuse...so I don't open the hole he will pass through and expand on the other side when he gets there. And then I feel stuck...cornered...and abused still. Ten months since I had him legally removed from the house. Only eleven months of marriage but I can’t even begin to feel longing for male companionship. No contact…NOT an option with a child born to us both. The law gives him rights…to use his child to get at me! My strength and awareness of him and what he is, my only defense. Sometimes I forget and act myself…a luxury I do not have. So I must remember, replay the abuse…so I don’t open the hole he will pass through and expand on the other side when he gets there. And then I feel stuck…cornered…and abused still.

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]]> By: summerthyme http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-747 summerthyme Sun, 22 Jul 2007 20:16:54 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-747 Soloflyer1961, I can relate to what you went through. The sociopath I was involved with was obsessed with fantasy sex about watching other men have sex with me. Although I never did it for him, he always talked about it. I think it's the only way he could get off. Also, I think he is bisexual but would not admit it to me. He told me he had sex with men, but then told me he lied about it that he didn't. Yes, he is a total "mind f---". He can't even be honest with himself. I am so sorry that you went through that. I think I am the same age as you and I met him when I was 43. I finally came to the conclusion that I did not come all this way in my life to put up with this. But I know how hard it is because you have so much of your emotions invested in the relationship. You are not that relationship and it's not your fault. He'll keep doing the same thing to whoever he is with. I have to work on forgiving myself for putting up with it for so long. Reading people's posts on this site helps because I know it's happened to a lot of good people. Sociopaths are manipulators, users and abusers. I think it is hard for us to understand how anyone could be like that so we give the benefit of the doubt, look for redeeming qualities. There are many reasons why we stay but the important thing is that we are out now and we stay out of those kinds of relationships. Take good care of yourself. Soloflyer1961, I can relate to what you went through. The sociopath I was involved with was obsessed with fantasy sex about watching other men have sex with me. Although I never did it for him, he always talked about it. I think it’s the only way he could get off. Also, I think he is bisexual but would not admit it to me. He told me he had sex with men, but then told me he lied about it that he didn’t. Yes, he is a total “mind f—”. He can’t even be honest with himself.
I am so sorry that you went through that. I think I am the same age as you and I met him when I was 43. I finally came to the conclusion that I did not come all this way in my life to put up with this. But I know how hard it is because you have so much of your emotions invested in the relationship. You are not that relationship and it’s not your fault. He’ll keep doing the same thing to whoever he is with. I have to work on forgiving myself for putting up with it for so long. Reading people’s posts on this site helps because I know it’s happened to a lot of good people. Sociopaths are manipulators, users and abusers. I think it is hard for us to understand how anyone could be like that so we give the benefit of the doubt, look for redeeming qualities. There are many reasons why we stay but the important thing is that we are out now and we stay out of those kinds of relationships. Take good care of yourself.

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]]> By: coukno http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-722 coukno Wed, 11 Jul 2007 17:00:04 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-722 Soloflyer1961, I can relate to a few experiences from above. My psycho also wanted to have sex with me in front of others, it seemed to be the only time he got very excited, just thinking about it. There were times I thought normal sex between two people who cared about each other was not exciting enough for him although he seemed very attracted to me. He also left me, thank God, less than a week after , asking me to marry him for the 30th time, saying I was the love of his life and making plans to be together for the rest of our lives. He moved out the day after Xmas like it was nothing after he got mad at me for being quiet when he purposely mislead me into believing what he was going to give me for Xmas. He promised many things, and delivered nothing. In the end he blamed me, of course accusing me of wanting only money from him. Meanwhile I am financially independant and had more assets than he did. Even though I told him i knew he didn't have much financially he still accused me of being a goldigger?? He was the goldigger, something he did alot was accuse me of being what he was. He was involved with another woman with in weeks of us spliting up doing the same thing, saying the same words and telling the same lies. It has taken me a while to start to feel better about myself. It has been 6 months now and I am a different person, for the better. Sorry to hear about your financial loss. Because I was recently divorced when we met, I had no interest in marriage, but it could have gone another way if I was ready for it. Soloflyer1961, I can relate to a few experiences from above. My psycho also wanted to have sex with me in front of others, it seemed to be the only time he got very excited, just thinking about it. There were times I thought normal sex between two people who cared about each other was not exciting enough for him although he seemed very attracted to me. He also left me, thank God, less than a week after , asking me to marry him for the 30th time, saying I was the love of his life and making plans to be together for the rest of our lives. He moved out the day after Xmas like it was nothing after he got mad at me for being quiet when he purposely mislead me into believing what he was going to give me for Xmas. He promised many things, and delivered nothing. In the end he blamed me, of course accusing me of wanting only money from him. Meanwhile I am financially independant and had more assets than he did. Even though I told him i knew he didn’t have much financially he still accused me of being a goldigger?? He was the goldigger, something he did alot was accuse me of being what he was. He was involved with another woman with in weeks of us spliting up doing the same thing, saying the same words and telling the same lies. It has taken me a while to start to feel better about myself. It has been 6 months now and I am a different person, for the better. Sorry to hear about your financial loss. Because I was recently divorced when we met, I had no interest in marriage, but it could have gone another way if I was ready for it.

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]]> By: soloflyer1961 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-702 soloflyer1961 Sun, 08 Jul 2007 23:02:34 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-702 I am only 4 months past his leaving. I have lost my job because I can not stop crying or get out of bed. He took thousands from me with his sob stories of poverty and yet has never once paid a dime back with his shallow promises. I have hired an attorney to go after him for everything, but how likely is retrieving anything?? I took out a loan for his car which I then paid off and he took the title and forged my name. He is a graphic artist and works for OUR goverment and is capable of forgery. Now the car is in HIS name and I can not claim the 20,000 he owes me on it due to his excellent forgery and lying skills. He robbed me of my heart, my soul, money and a normal life. I was 40 when I met him "on-Line" and he lied to me about building a life with me. He even produced a cheap engagement ring 2 years ago so I would feel more secure to buy him a car and lend him thousands more. He would hang at bars and party every night and then be furious that I was upset about it. I was not allowed to call him on Sundays or Mondays during football season because I was a bother during his games. If all this wasn't enough--he was a sexual deviant and pervert. He was obsessed with me having sex in front of him with other men ALL the time. He uses and sells drugs and yet works for the Goverment doing classified airstrip simulators for Rock Well Collins--makes me feel real safe with our security system. I have had no contact in 4 months because he left me 12 hours after telling me I was the love of his life and we would be married in October! Then he went on a business "trip" with 2 women. I had a heart attack while he was gone and when I tried to reach him at the hotel in Boston to tell him---he told me to %$#@ off and I was ruining his trip with these women!!! I never heard from him again other than nasty e-mails telling me what a pain I was and how I ruined his trip because I had a heart attack. ! Please ladies--I know he is out there and dating someone---I wish her better sense than I had! 4 months and I am still grieving--over what????? 6 lost years?? over 60,000 lost cash---the lost promise of a husband. I have lost 30 pounds in 4 months, my job, my sanity--when does it stop! He blamed 100% of everything on me and my insecurities. I still feel as everthing was my fault, but after 4 months of counseling I know in my head it was not my fault at all. He walked away as easily after 6 years as someone walking away from a hot stove. It is slowly killing me inside knowing I was nothing more than a thing he used for his own gains and pleasure I am only 4 months past his leaving. I have lost my job because I can not stop crying or get out of bed. He took thousands from me with his sob stories of poverty and yet has never once paid a dime back with his shallow promises. I have hired an attorney to go after him for everything, but how likely is retrieving anything?? I took out a loan for his car which I then paid off and he took the title and forged my name. He is a graphic artist and works for OUR goverment and is capable of forgery. Now the car is in HIS name and I can not claim the 20,000 he owes me on it due to his excellent forgery and lying skills. He robbed me of my heart, my soul, money and a normal life. I was 40 when I met him “on-Line” and he lied to me about building a life with me. He even produced a cheap engagement ring 2 years ago so I would feel more secure to buy him a car and lend him thousands more. He would hang at bars and party every night and then be furious that I was upset about it. I was not allowed to call him on Sundays or Mondays during football season because I was a bother during his games. If all this wasn’t enough–he was a sexual deviant and pervert. He was obsessed with me having sex in front of him with other men ALL the time. He uses and sells drugs and yet works for the Goverment doing classified airstrip simulators for Rock Well Collins–makes me feel real safe with our security system. I have had no contact in 4 months because he left me 12 hours after telling me I was the love of his life and we would be married in October! Then he went on a business “trip” with 2 women. I had a heart attack while he was gone and when I tried to reach him at the hotel in Boston to tell him—he told me to %$#@ off and I was ruining his trip with these women!!! I never heard from him again other than nasty e-mails telling me what a pain I was and how I ruined his trip because I had a heart attack. ! Please ladies–I know he is out there and dating someone—I wish her better sense than I had! 4 months and I am still grieving–over what????? 6 lost years?? over 60,000 lost cash—the lost promise of a husband. I have lost 30 pounds in 4 months, my job, my sanity–when does it stop! He blamed 100% of everything on me and my insecurities. I still feel as everthing was my fault, but after 4 months of counseling I know in my head it was not my fault at all. He walked away as easily after 6 years as someone walking away from a hot stove. It is slowly killing me inside knowing I was nothing more than a thing he used for his own gains and pleasure

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]]> By: M.L. Gallagher http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-686 M.L. Gallagher Mon, 02 Jul 2007 17:51:20 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-686 Hi AlohaTraveler, I wrote this morning on my blog, (www.recoveryourjob.blogspot.com) about what it means to me re my accountability and choices and the fundamental, irrefutable truth -- no matter what I did, what I believed, what I thought, I never ever deserved to be abused. No one does. Nothing can ever justify their lies, their manipulations, their deceit. I remember those days when a cell phone ringing somewhere in the room, if it had the same ring tone as his, would send my nerves on edge. It took about a year for that to quieten, and still, every so often, a tone will erupt and I'll fill that shrill response within me. It only lasts a second -- but in that second, eternity exits. Fortunately, I am able to remind myself, that was then, this is now, take a breath and continue on with my beautiful day. Forgiveness for me was and is the key. When I walk with a forgiving heart I am peaceful and joyful. And you're right, it is something I never thought I would fall for, have happen to me -- it did though, which goes to show there's always something new to learn! In having become the victor, I am stronger, more confident, more self-assured than I was before him. I know who I am, I know and uphold my values, beliefs and principles. I am unshakable. I am free. what an awesome gift. Thank you for the site reference. I will check it out! Thank you for sharing your journey as well. When we share our stories we support each other, light the way and create space for our new stories to begin. Shine on! MLG Hi AlohaTraveler,

I wrote this morning on my blog, (www.recoveryourjob.blogspot.com) about what it means to me re my accountability and choices and the fundamental, irrefutable truth — no matter what I did, what I believed, what I thought, I never ever deserved to be abused. No one does. Nothing can ever justify their lies, their manipulations, their deceit.

I remember those days when a cell phone ringing somewhere in the room, if it had the same ring tone as his, would send my nerves on edge. It took about a year for that to quieten, and still, every so often, a tone will erupt and I’ll fill that shrill response within me. It only lasts a second — but in that second, eternity exits. Fortunately, I am able to remind myself, that was then, this is now, take a breath and continue on with my beautiful day.

Forgiveness for me was and is the key. When I walk with a forgiving heart I am peaceful and joyful. And you’re right, it is something I never thought I would fall for, have happen to me — it did though, which goes to show there’s always something new to learn!

In having become the victor, I am stronger, more confident, more self-assured than I was before him. I know who I am, I know and uphold my values, beliefs and principles. I am unshakable. I am free.

what an awesome gift.

Thank you for the site reference. I will check it out!

Thank you for sharing your journey as well. When we share our stories we support each other, light the way and create space for our new stories to begin.

Shine on!

MLG

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]]> By: alohatraveler http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-682 alohatraveler Sun, 01 Jul 2007 06:48:51 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-682 Hello M.L. This is in response to your post about being in relationship. I was with a Borderline Personality Disorder. He was very extreme and I related a lot to the information on Psychopaths. I have experienced the shut down feeling that other women have talked about in regard to relationships. And I also have these funny moments where I see people kissing in TV and I think to myself "oh, how nice. I forgot about that.. that looks interesting" but so far, I don't think I am ready to open my heart. I date very very little. On a date about a month ago (my first in a year), my date told me that he sensed that I was on "high alert" and waiting for the "bad man" to come out. Ugh. He totally got me... I was doing that. I didn't really realize it until he pointed it out and then I felt sick. On "no contact"... yes. I get this. I find that I feel anxiety attack symptoms just reading some of this material as it brings up those painful moments I went through. No contact is the only way. My heart still jumps out of my chest when I get a text message chiming in even thought I changed my number. I will never forget when I moved home and had to shut off my number. The cell phone company cut the number and I started to cry with relief. When he used to email me, I would stay awake all night arguing with him in my head. How could he be saying what he is saying to me? How could he believe he is the victim of me? On manipulation. He cried. I knew it was fake in my stomach. He just wanted to see if he could "bleed" me some more as you said. On forgiving yourself... thanks for saying "it's his shame" or something like that.. I have to look back. I have spent many many hours wondering how I could let that happen. The more I read about all this, the more I see that I was absolutely no match for what I was up against. And like all the others, he was a dream come true at first. I am going to share the informaton I found on this site with a friend of mine who went through a similiar thing at about the same time as me. We have eachother and that has been healing for us. It is difficult to describe to ppl how this happens, how it feels, and how it hurts to someone that has not experienced this kind of thing. Until it happens to you, it is something you think you could never fall for. Anyway, I could relate for hours what I learned here but I won't. Just wanted to tell you that I found reference to this site on www.dontdatehimgirl.com. That might be a good place to advertise your book. Many of the stories on there sound strangely familiar. I saw another post by someone else that described my story even better and it wasn't even about him. What I wrote was only the tip of the iceberg. Of course, it wasn't the tip of the iceberg that sunk the Titanic, was it? Thanks for sharing your story and your healing. Truly. Sincerely... AlohaTraveler Hello M.L.

This is in response to your post about being in relationship. I was with a Borderline Personality Disorder. He was very extreme and I related a lot to the information on Psychopaths.

I have experienced the shut down feeling that other women have talked about in regard to relationships. And I also have these funny moments where I see people kissing in TV and I think to myself “oh, how nice. I forgot about that.. that looks interesting” but so far, I don’t think I am ready to open my heart. I date very very little. On a date about a month ago (my first in a year), my date told me that he sensed that I was on “high alert” and waiting for the “bad man” to come out. Ugh. He totally got me… I was doing that. I didn’t really realize it until he pointed it out and then I felt sick.

On “no contact”… yes. I get this. I find that I feel anxiety attack symptoms just reading some of this material as it brings up those painful moments I went through. No contact is the only way. My heart still jumps out of my chest when I get a text message chiming in even thought I changed my number. I will never forget when I moved home and had to shut off my number. The cell phone company cut the number and I started to cry with relief. When he used to email me, I would stay awake all night arguing with him in my head. How could he be saying what he is saying to me? How could he believe he is the victim of me?

On manipulation. He cried. I knew it was fake in my stomach. He just wanted to see if he could “bleed” me some more as you said.

On forgiving yourself… thanks for saying “it’s his shame” or something like that.. I have to look back. I have spent many many hours wondering how I could let that happen. The more I read about all this, the more I see that I was absolutely no match for what I was up against. And like all the others, he was a dream come true at first.

I am going to share the informaton I found on this site with a friend of mine who went through a similiar thing at about the same time as me. We have eachother and that has been healing for us. It is difficult to describe to ppl how this happens, how it feels, and how it hurts to someone that has not experienced this kind of thing. Until it happens to you, it is something you think you could never fall for.

Anyway, I could relate for hours what I learned here but I won’t. Just wanted to tell you that I found reference to this site on http://www.dontdatehimgirl.com. That might be a good place to advertise your book. Many of the stories on there sound strangely familiar. I saw another post by someone else that described my story even better and it wasn’t even about him. What I wrote was only the tip of the iceberg. Of course, it wasn’t the tip of the iceberg that sunk the Titanic, was it?

Thanks for sharing your story and your healing. Truly.
Sincerely… AlohaTraveler

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]]> By: Sunny http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-667 Sunny Mon, 25 Jun 2007 18:01:33 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-667 Dear M.L. Thank you for your response. And for your article. Everything you say is true. Focus on my goals, but as you know, the aftermath of life with a sociopath sometimes highjacks your brain and off you go, whirling, trying to fix something that can't be fixed, but has to be healed and discarded. I am glad for posts like this and people like you, a touchstone not provided for anywhere else. I thought he was the love of my life and to know he is on to someone new in just days, giving her all the words, charm, dates and sweetness he used to fool me, fills me with envy, sadness and fear for her. But like you said. It's time for me. And to all those out there who are in the beginning stages of healing, it does get better with time. It is slower than most breakups or disappointments but will happen. Thank you, M.L!!! Dear M.L. Thank you for your response. And for your article. Everything you say is true. Focus on my goals, but as you know, the aftermath of life with a sociopath sometimes highjacks your brain and off you go, whirling, trying to fix something that can’t be fixed, but has to be healed and discarded.

I am glad for posts like this and people like you, a touchstone not provided for anywhere else. I thought he was the love of my life and to know he is on to someone new in just days, giving her all the words, charm, dates and sweetness he used to fool me, fills me with envy, sadness and fear for her. But like you said. It’s time for me.

And to all those out there who are in the beginning stages of healing, it does get better with time. It is slower than most breakups or disappointments but will happen. Thank you, M.L!!!

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]]> By: M.L. Gallagher http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-663 M.L. Gallagher Fri, 22 Jun 2007 19:02:09 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-663 Dear Sunny, You ask some interesting questions -- How could I fall for his act. How could I not see the evil in his heart? We fall because we see the love they are holding out to us and reach back in the expectation that they are who they say they are, who they appear. We cannot concieve that they would be lying about that most precious, tender, and fragile part of themselves -- their hearts -- until it's too late. We've opened up our hearts to their scrutiny and been sucked into the web of their deciet. We can't see the evil in their hearts because they hide it. It is not a deficiency in us -- it has everything to do with them. No matter how far I get from that relationship, I always have more work to do on me -- that's the fun part! Getting to know all of me. Falling in love with the wonder of me. Surrendering to the beauty of my life, exactly the way I am. Don't berate yourself for having had contact -- love yourself for having the courage to re-implement No Contact. Protect yourself. Fiercely. Completely. Lovingly. Do not even take his calls. Don't listen to a word he says -- He is The Lie. Whether or not he's with someone new is nothing to do with you. You're very wise to recognize that he is after supply -- focus on the truth and let go of WHY. The question of 'what is the matter with ME?' is the one I have focussed on. To find my answers I delve into what is right with me. What do I want in my life. Does what I'm doing support me in attaining my dreams, or detract me from reaching my goals? If I want A in my life, does doing B get me more of what I want or less? I keep myself honest, and open to what I'm doing. I do not berate, denigrate or criticize myself -- I acknowledge where and when I make mistakes and then take steps to improve. When I know better, I do better. You're on the right track Sunny. Loving yourself exactly the way you are. Forgive yourself when you slip and hold yourself up to the light of knowing -- you are awesome. Dear Sunny, You ask some interesting questions — How could I fall for his act. How could I not see the evil in his heart? We fall because we see the love they are holding out to us and reach back in the expectation that they are who they say they are, who they appear. We cannot concieve that they would be lying about that most precious, tender, and fragile part of themselves — their hearts — until it’s too late. We’ve opened up our hearts to their scrutiny and been sucked into the web of their deciet. We can’t see the evil in their hearts because they hide it. It is not a deficiency in us — it has everything to do with them.

No matter how far I get from that relationship, I always have more work to do on me — that’s the fun part! Getting to know all of me. Falling in love with the wonder of me. Surrendering to the beauty of my life, exactly the way I am.

Don’t berate yourself for having had contact — love yourself for having the courage to re-implement No Contact. Protect yourself. Fiercely. Completely. Lovingly. Do not even take his calls. Don’t listen to a word he says — He is The Lie.

Whether or not he’s with someone new is nothing to do with you. You’re very wise to recognize that he is after supply — focus on the truth and let go of WHY.

The question of ‘what is the matter with ME?’ is the one I have focussed on. To find my answers I delve into what is right with me. What do I want in my life. Does what I’m doing support me in attaining my dreams, or detract me from reaching my goals? If I want A in my life, does doing B get me more of what I want or less? I keep myself honest, and open to what I’m doing. I do not berate, denigrate or criticize myself — I acknowledge where and when I make mistakes and then take steps to improve. When I know better, I do better.

You’re on the right track Sunny. Loving yourself exactly the way you are. Forgive yourself when you slip and hold yourself up to the light of knowing — you are awesome.

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]]> By: Sunny http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/comment-page-1/#comment-662 Sunny Thu, 21 Jun 2007 20:29:22 +0000 http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2007/06/21/after-the-sociopath-time-passes-love-heals/#comment-662 Hi, I just wrote to another blogger on How To Get Over the Heartache of Being Conned on the June 1 issue. I wrote cause I think was conned by the same man as her!!! OMG! But now, blogging about it made me feel all the sickness twisting around inside that I had thought healed. So your story about no contact is true in the emotional and pyshical way. I was doing so well. I got my email from lovefraud today and decided to log on. Maybe i shouldn't have. It helped me heal when times were tough after Mark T ruinied my life. I thought I was okay today, now I cry. I have to not talk when he calls me telling me he still misses me and love me. I've taken him back SO many times over such a long time. I feel like an idiot AGAIN. So I can't even think about him. I thought I was fine. I know he's already with someone new immediately and I know how he cheated over and over (god knows how many) on me the whole time I thought I was the only one...I slowly figured it all out piece by piece and still take him back when he fakes tears, or fakes feeling sad...and it's all just too hook you in again for supply. No contact. No contact. Why would I want contact when I know the truth? What is the matter with ME?...like she said..he makes women fall in love with him for sport. like a game. like a hunter and the kill. Why would I ever speak again to such a creature. Thanks for your lovely blog about feelings fading. They do. they did. But I made contact, or rather, thought about him and the pain in my heart reopened. I pray he doesn't destroy the new girls he snatches up on the Internet site as fast as he did me...and the one before her...and before her and before her and before her. How could I fall for his act. He made all these promises, was so sweet and loving, he created a fantasy with no intentions of fufulling it. How cruel. How cruel to the children. How could I not see the evil in his heart. I guess I have lots more work to do. Hi, I just wrote to another blogger on How To Get Over the Heartache of Being Conned on the June 1 issue. I wrote cause I think was conned by the same man as her!!! OMG! But now, blogging about it made me feel all the sickness twisting around inside that I had thought healed. So your story about no contact is true in the emotional and pyshical way. I was doing so well.

I got my email from lovefraud today and decided to log on. Maybe i shouldn’t have. It helped me heal when times were tough after Mark T ruinied my life. I thought I was okay today, now I cry. I have to not talk when he calls me telling me he still misses me and love me. I’ve taken him back SO many times over such a long time. I feel like an idiot AGAIN. So I can’t even think about him. I thought I was fine. I know he’s already with someone new immediately and I know how he cheated over and over (god knows how many) on me the whole time I thought I was the only one…I slowly figured it all out piece by piece and still take him back when he fakes tears, or fakes feeling sad…and it’s all just too hook you in again for supply.

No contact. No contact. Why would I want contact when I know the truth? What is the matter with ME?…like she said..he makes women fall in love with him for sport. like a game. like a hunter and the kill. Why would I ever speak again to such a creature.

Thanks for your lovely blog about feelings fading. They do. they did. But I made contact, or rather, thought about him and the pain in my heart reopened. I pray he doesn’t destroy the new girls he snatches up on the Internet site as fast as he did me…and the one before her…and before her and before her and before her. How could I fall for his act. He made all these promises, was so sweet and loving, he created a fantasy with no intentions of fufulling it. How cruel. How cruel to the children. How could I not see the evil in his heart. I guess I have lots more work to do.

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