I am a Child Protection social worker in the UK and can only speak from the perspective of that country of course. Also I don’t have all the information I would need to make a proper ‘professional assessment in any way. However, with that disclaimer, I am concerned enough to suggest as others have done that you should seriously consider calling Children’s Services in your area – you can do this anonymously (refuse to give names/identifying details) in the first instance to ‘take the temperature’ if you wish. Of course if the SW is doing their job they will pressure you very much to give identifying details (that’s what I’d do!!)

If your concern is your daughter taking your GD out to bars etc and GD’s hearing could be long-term damaged etc then this could be considered significant physical/emotional child abuse (depending entirely on whether your concerns can be independently evidenced somehow).

Any CP worker would also take into consideration frequency of visits to bars and other contextual information. In my own practice I find that I (and fellow SW’s) are not usually fooled by ‘nice houses – tidy, clean etc’ when it comes to this particular form of abuse – clearly having a tidy house is ‘nothing to do with it’.

If this were allocated to me I would likely insist on hearing tests for the child if the ‘basic facts’ i.e. the child is being regularly exposed to loud music could be established.

Please consider that if other abuse occurs (likely if your D is truely a P or S) and CS become involved anyway if someone else reports concerns – you would not want to be seen to have ‘protected’ your D over your GD by NOT reporting abuse.

The downside is that your daughter would likely unleash ‘war on you’ and probably stop access to GD if she can, though CS would try to prevent this in my experience. It is likely that stopping the relationship formerly enjoyed with your would be seen as further proof of emotionally abusive behaviour by your D to your GD.

No-one can make this crucial decision for you. And just because this is ‘my view’ I absolutely cannot say what another CP SW would say or see the situation – because I don’t have ‘all the facts’ of course.

Blessings

Delta 1

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My hand held tape recorder was my best friend.

Peace.

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Before she was hired, he made it clear to everyone that there was only qualification – and that the woman hired be “wife safe” in looks. It didn’t matter to him if she could do the job, etc., as long as his wife didn’t consider her a threat, he was happy.

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Thank God you got away from her clutches because, it’s all about her, her, her, her, her.

Oh, P.S. You never tell an ash hole, they are an ash hole. Why? Because they are an ash hole.

Peace.

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This woman is something else! What I question is why your empoyer would want to keep her around – she’s bad news. You have my sympathy – sociopaths know how to ruin your day. It’s unfortunate that decent, normal people get targeted by these creatures, making life difficult.

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The new Park Manager had no morals, so when SS was hired as an office clerk, she was comfortable in her new home. Prior to that time, she had worked at a prison and often talked about it as being a place she enjoyed working. The only thing she didn’t like was the structured environment. (I have often wondered if she willingly left that job.) Others told me, she had not been able to keep any other job.

SS started trying to manipulate me into letting her have her way soon after she was hired. She would tell me what a great job I did, even though it was obvious she had no knowledge of the type of work I did. She tried to convince me that we shared like interests and even went so far as to claim to know members of my family, my wife’s boss, and pretended to have had conversations with my wife. All were lies made without so much as blinking an eye.

When that didn’t get the results she wanted, she started flirting with me. She openly stated that her marriage meant nothing to her. She used her kids to talk about herself; it was never about them. When I tried to remind her she was married, she let me know that she was going to do what she wanted. She had no respect for anyone. She was very aggressive when it came to getting her way.

SS was an ugly woman, grossly overweight with no redeeming physical characteristics. She was jealous of anything that might take attention away from her. She disliked other women and tried to convince the men at work that she looked better than them. She even went so far as to run down a new born baby to us. Even though she had a huge flat butt, she wiggled it in front of me and tried to get me to compliment her. I didn’t. The worse she got, the more I tried to avoid her. Each time she pulled something, I would walk away and hope she got the hint that I wasn’t interested. She never did. As soon as I would get one thing stopped she would try something else.

It wasn’t long before she was trying to find ways to be alone with me. She tried to force her way into going with me (I was often in inaccessible areas of the Park.) I let her know I wasn’t going to take her with me, but that didn’t stop her from trying to get the manager to make me take her. I refused.
It wasn’t long before she started trying to corner me at the office and talk about sex. She would be talking about something innocent and suddenly tell me she was good in bed, or that she liked to look at men’s penis’s and watch them masturbate. She blatantly propositioned me on more than one occasion. Each time she would pull this, I would quit what I was doing and leave. I thought surely she would realize I wasn’t interested. But she never stopped. I started trying to completely avoid her.

No matter how many times I stopped her, Stephanie continued to get worse and worse. When it became impossible to corner me at the office, she started showing up where I was working and even at the shop during my lunch hour. She brought a meal for two and tried to get me to share it with her. I ignored her then eventually had to confront her and had to make her leave.

A week later, she overheard a conversation between the Park Manager and myself and thought she had found another way to be with me –I was able to stop her before she had a chance to further her agenda.

Even when I refused to speak to her, she pursued me. Eventually I had to confront her and tell her to leave me alone. I was very clear and laid out exactly what I wouldn’t allow. I told her any dealings she had with me were to be kept strictly professional. I tried to do it in a way that would cause the least amount of drama, and still get my point across. I explained that her actions were causing gossip and that I didn’t want my family embarrassed by the gossip. She told me she didn’t care how anything looked, what anyone thought, and that no one was going to tell her what to do. In fact, she continued to argue with me until I finally told her she was acting like a bitch in heat.

By the next day, she had twisted that conversation to mean that my wife was jealous of her and told my boss that my wife made me call her that. (Of course I didn’t know this until some months later when I got my personnel file. During the meeting she hinted I had problems at home, but there were no open accusation against my wife.) My boss said that my calling her a bitch in heat could be considered sexual harassment. I told him I hadn’t called her anything but said that was how she was acting towards me. It soon became obvious that she was trying to get me to back down from my stance. I didn’t.

After thinking about some of the things she had said during the meeting, I decided to confront her one final time the next day. I wanted it clear that I wasn’t going to put up with anything else from her. At the final meeting, she once again tried to get me to back down. First she told me that they had tried to get her to file a complaint against me, but she wouldn’t do it. Then she started talking about the divorce rate in prison, and how wives couldn’t deal with their husband’s work. At the time, I couldn’t fathom what she was talking about; I didn’t work in a prison. Then she asked if I was sure that was all I wanted between us? I told her that I meant what I said, any dealings with me were to be kept strictly professional. It wasn’t until much later, that I realized she was suggesting that I divorce my wife.

Once it finally became clear to SS that I had drawn the line and she wasn’t going to be able to manipulate me, she decided to get even with me. After 16 years of a perfect record I was fired. Even though I got my job back, I couldn’t stay there.

One more thing I need to add is that I wasn’t the only one she made sexual advances toward at the park. A few Park visitors said they would never be back because of her. I overheard her teasing one male employees about being a minuteman in bed, found notes to the manager telling him he was full of snot, but not in his nose, listened to complaints about her and another employee being locked in the office during office hours, and refusing to open the door, etc. It seems as if I was the only one to see through her, or at least the only one that objected to her actions.

I was raised to respect women and treat them like ladies. This one didn’t deserve it. I filed sexual harassment charges against her, but as far as I know, nothing was done. When I left the park, she didn’t stop. About a month later, we returned home from a weekend at our son’s to find a pair of her panties in our bedroom. Other things were done that left little doubt who had been there, but we asked around until we found someone who could give us a description of the persons entering our house. No one should have to put up with the unwanted and unsolicited advances that I had to put up with from this very sick individual.

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you have to know – spaths can look like the BEST people to us – it’s called the ‘lovebomb.’

be careful.

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M1zS

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First….please delete your email…..go to the edit function and take it out. We can all respond to you here.

Second….I am going to assume you have read all of the comments from survivors who have debated about warning….to warn or not to warn…..and how the ‘warning’ has been received.

Okay…..so mom and sister have given you info……WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING STICKING AROUND WITH THIS GIRL FOR???????
You said yourself….you don’t want to fuC& yourself over…..
Well……your gonna!

There is NOTHING you can do to change this girl, head off her behaviors or anything else you can do to avoid her wrath of hurt you have been warned about.

So again…..WHY ARE YOU STILL AROUND?

Her own mother and sister……HELLLLLLOOOOOOO.

They have given you a gift……if you choose to take it, you will do yourself great honor. If you return it to sender…..you;ll find out soon enough….the HARD way. ( and I assure you….when you have your ‘aha’ moment…you will wish you would have taken their gift)….
There are NO awards for being with a sociopath. Trust me…..only pain, destruction…..and the long process of healing and picking up the pieces.

Get out!

In the meantime…..stick around LF….and read our stories and the articles. It will give you good insight on what could be in your future.

Welcome to LF….I hope for you…..you can gain enough education to make the best decision for yourself.

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