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Lovefraud Blog

By September 13, 2016 0 Comments

New research says 3% to 21% of executives have psychopathic traits

BusinessmanPsychopaths are as common in the upper echelons of the corporate world as they are in prison, according to forensic psychologist Nathan Brooks.

In research presented in Australia this week, Brooks and his colleagues found that 21 percent of 261 corporate professionals in the supply chain management industry had clinically significant levels of psychopathic traits.

Brooks said job candidates should be assessed first on their character, and then on whether they have the needed skills and qualifications, according to the Sydney Morning Herald.

One in five bosses is a psychopath, research reveals, on SMH.com.au.

How to tell if your co-worker is a psychopath, on NYPost.com.

Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.

By September 12, 2016 0 Comments

Video: Aren’t there any laws against social predators?

Here’s the next installment of our “Letters to Lovefraud” video series.

A Lovefraud reader lost $38,000 to a con artist who has a history of scamming women. He employs the same deception and manipulation tactics time after time, cycling through a new woman every four months. 

If you’ve had a similar experience, I explain why the con artist may or may not be prosecuted, what you can possibly do, and what you should think about before making a move.

By September 10, 2016 3 Comments

Interview: Lying to get someone in bed is sexual assault

Joyce Short

Joyce Short

Catch Joyce Short, author of Carnal Abuse by Deceit, and soon-to-be released, Don’t Swallow That Catfish Hook, discussing why “lying to get laid” is a crime on CBC radio Sunday, September 11, 2016 at 11 am EDT.

Jim Brown, an award winning producer and the highly acclaimed host of The 180 – Canada’s national radio show to spark conversation on hot topics – jumped right in on the important question …

“People often tell little white lies to impress a possible partner. At what point do those lies add up to fraud?“

Short stresses that this discussion applies to sexual assault by fraud victims, whether they live in Bombay, Boston or Bangkok. “All around the world, victims suffer the humiliation and defilement of romance scams,” she says. 

The broadcast airs at 11 am (EDT) on Sunday morning, 9/11. Listen, and add your voice to the comment dialogue that follows!

Posted in: Laws and courts
By September 10, 2016 3 Comments

Lies, manipulation, cheating, fraud, drugs, fake remorse, threats — this marriage to a sociopath had it all

LETTERS LOGO 2Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call “Noreen.”

My soon-to-be ex-husband of 14 years, whom I thought was loving, adoring and charming, is actually a very manipulative, deceitful and emotionally abusive sociopath.

Met at 17

He hooked me at 17 years old. I was fun, ambitious and a lot of boys pursued me. Best of all, I was naive. I see the good in everyone. And even though he did some bad stuff at the time … I attributed it to him just being a teenager.

I was amazed how he seemed to be a magnet to everyone around him. People were drawn to him. He was so charismatic and no matter what he did … they loved him. We met working for a retail shop and he was the worst employee, yet he was praised for being the best. He made fun of our co-workers to their face, and they would laugh at him because they thought he was joking, and they loved him for it. Even though I didn’t like that, I felt like I was privileged that he wanted me.

By September 9, 2016 22 Comments

Senior Sociopath survey: Were you involved with a sociopath who was over the age of 50?

I Am Angry On You.There’s a rumor floating around in mental health circles that sociopaths “burn out” with age, that they engage in less antisocial behavior as they get older.

Is this true?

Lovefraud wants to find out. So we’ve developed a survey to gather data from you.

Were you involved with a sociopath while he or she was over age 50? The individual could have been any of the following:

  • Your spouse or ex-spouse
  • Your romantic partner
  • Your parent
  • Angry Frowning Man with Arms FoldedYour stepparent
  • Your child
  • Your stepchild
  • Your sibling
  • Another family member
  • A work colleague
  • A business associate
  • A friend, neighbor or acquaintance

If you are familiar with how this individual behaved while over the age of 50, please fill out our survey. You may complete it anonymously, although if you would like to provide contact information for follow-up, you are welcome to do so.

By September 8, 2016 8 Comments

It’s Not Complicated—He’s a Sociopath

 

Husband Liar SociopathEvery week, a chapter of my book, “Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned” (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.

Chapter 22: The Show Must Go On

“Where secrecy or mystery begins, vice or roguery is not far off.”

— Samuel Johnson

 

Keeping my life all but invisible and inconsequential to Paul was not the only pillar upon which the “success” of my marriage (i.e., lack of tension) depended. Another pillar was accepting living in an information void. Secrecy is symptomatic of sociopaths. They use it to cover things up—gambling, other women, and various self-indulgent pastimes of which the average spouse might not approve. Perhaps they also tend toward secrecy because it makes them feel powerful to withhold information—to know something to which no one else is privy. No matter the reason, I learned to live with only scraps of information about where my husband was on any given day or night.

Posted in: Uncategorized

Help for building your support team so you can end a toxic relationship

 

Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW

Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW

By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW

Starting September 24, 2016, I will be hosting a five-week Roller Coaster Relationship Recovery Seminar & Support Group by teleconference for people in the US and EU. I especially invite readers of Lovefraud.com to join me in this powerful, supportive environment dedicated to cultivating the skills and strategies you need to create your best, happiest, sanest life possible after a difficult relationship with a toxic partner.

In my recent book, The Five Step Exit: Skills You Need to Leave a Narcissist, Psychopath, or Other Toxic Partner and Recover Your Happiness Now, I recommend that anyone who is involved with a toxic partner, preparing to leave a roller coaster relationship, or recovering from a crazy-making situation assemble a support team. Toxic relationships are complicated, confusing, and difficult. Often, an exploitive person’s manipulations result in a partner being isolated from friends and family who serve as important reality anchors and havens of support. When you become more aware of how toxic your relationship is, you become stronger by ending your isolation and increasing your resources.

By September 6, 2016 0 Comments

Helping children overcome genetic risk for externalizing disorders

 

Liane_SSSP_crop copyBy Liane J. Leedom, M.D.

Imagine loving someone, having children with that person, and then realizing that you’ve gotten yourself involved in an abusive relationship.

Imagine suspecting that your partner, the mother or father of your children, has a personality disorder — and then hearing that personality disorders are highly genetic.

If you’re a therapist, imagine this person is your client. What do you do?

I believe we can and should intervene in the lives of children who are at risk of developing externalizing disorders, such as ADHD, conduct disorder, oppositional defiant disorder, and substance use disorders. If we do, we may be able to prevent these children from developing personality disorders as adults.

When we study large numbers of people affected by externalizing disorders, and personality disorders in particular, we see that about 50 percent of the risk for these disorders is genetic. That means the environment children grow up in, including their interactions with parents, siblings and peers, also strongly influences the development of disorder.

By September 5, 2016 2 Comments

How do I avoid dating a sociopath like my father?

A 24-year-old woman asks for advice. Her father is a sociopath, and so was her boyfriend. She doesn’t know what a healthy relationship looks like — so how can she learn to avoid dating another sociopath?

I explain that the young woman not only had poor role models, she’s suffering from a betrayal bond. The best thing she can do is work on her personal recovery. Then, I tell her how to protect herself from sociopaths.

Letters to Lovefraud Videos is a new feature of Lovefraud.com. If you have a question that you’d like me to answer in a video, please send it to donna at lovefraud dot com.

More Lovefraud videos

Posted in: Donna Andersen
By September 5, 2016 0 Comments

Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, offers FREE online chat support group Sunday Sept. 11

Mary Ann GlynnExperience the support of people who know! Join our free online live chat support group next Sunday night, Sept. 11, 8 pm EDT at www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com.  Share your struggles and get feedback, support, and hope from others who get it.  The group is professionally run.  

The last group started 15 minutes late due to a technical glitch. If you tried to get on, our sincere apologies. It shouldn’t happen again. Please join us on Sunday.

Here’s how to join:

At 8 pm come to the site and scroll down the home page to the Services section. Click on the highlighted “live chat support group,” and you will be brought to the chat room as a Guest#.

Hope to see you there!