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Archive for August, 2016

What teachers need to know about sociopaths and abusive dating

The smartest way to deal with love fraud is to prevent it, to teach people how to spot it before they get hooked.

That’s why I love presenting to students and teachers. Knowledge is power, and knowledge that sociopaths exist, and that they usually start their lying and manipulation in high school, gives young people the power to protect themselves.

The newest program offered by Lovefraud Continuing Education is geared directly towards teachers and other education professionals. It is a video of a presentation I did last year for the Association of Student Assistance Professionals of New Jersey.

School systems often require teachers and other school professionals to be on the lookout for dating violence. But violence is usually the culmination of an abusive relationship — not the starting point. In this program, I teach educators the Red Flags of Love Fraud, so they can help students avoid dangerous involvements in the first place.


Anthony Weiner sexting again; wife Huma Abedin, Hillary Clinton’s senior aide, leaving him

Anthony Weiner from his Twitter account, which no longer exists.

Anthony Weiner from his Twitter account, which he deleted.

Anthony Weiner, former Congressman and former candidate for New York City mayor, was caught again sending photos of his junk to a woman who was not his wife. This time, his 4-year-old son was in bed with Weiner when he texted the photo.

His wife, Huma Abedin, senior aide to Hillary Clinton, has finally dumped him.

The New York Post broke the story.

Anthony Weiner sexted busty brunette while his son was in bed with him, on NYPost.com.

More coverage of the Anthony Weiner saga on the New York Post.

Previous Lovefraud coverage:

Open letter to Huma Abedin: You’re married to a sociopath

Sexual predators for mayor: Anthony Weiner and Bob Filner

Lawrence O’Donnell asks Anthony Weiner: What is wrong with you?

 

 

13 very early warning signs that your new partner may be a controller

Image courtesy of nenetus at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of nenetus at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The best way to escape a controlling or abusive relationship is to get out before you are emotionally hooked. But how can you tell when a new romantic interest may turn into a problem partner?

Here are 13 very early warning signs that may precede later abusive behavior.

  1. Your new partner monopolizes your time

You are spending all your free time with your partner – perhaps even seeing him or her every day. If you spend any time with someone else, your partner seems hurt, annoyed or even angry.

  1. Your new partner calls or texts constantly

You may get calls and texts 24/7 – even if you are also spending a lot of time with this person. If you don’t respond immediately and your partner demands to know why – well, consider this a serious warning.

Domestic violence and brain trauma

brainMany women who endured domestic violence suffer from headaches, memory loss, and confused thinking. The cause may be traumatic brain injuries due to blows to the head. Women may be exposed to the same type of head injuries as football players.

Fists not football: Brain injuries seen in domestic assaults, on Foxnews.com.

I help him escape; she manipulates him back and wipes out all his money

Spath TalesEditor’s note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a woman whom we’ll call “Carlotta.”

I started out close friends with a man married to a sociopathic woman, which later turned into a romantic relationship.

This woman was evil to the core. He attempted to divorce her multiple times, but to no avail.

She always used manipulation to get him back. Once back, she wipes all the money out that I helped him save. She took every, every penny he had and left him with nothing.

He made very good money, plus got a pension to boot. She would take everything for herself. His bank accounts never had more than a few dollars in it. She took out multiple loans in his name (she conned him into signing for them), which he never saw a dime of.

Once You’re Hooked by a Sociopath, Expect Double Standards–Remember It’s All About Them

Husband Liar Sociopath

By O.N. Ward

Every week, a chapter of my book, “Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned” (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.

Chapter 20: What Double Standard?

Blinding me even further to how emotionally vacant my relationship with Paul was becoming was the joy and exhaustion of motherhood. It was beyond anything I had ever experienced, anticipated, or imagined. My love for Jessica was so profound and deep, as if I had discovered a hidden, untapped well of joy inside me. Once Jessica was born, I knew I could not return to work full-time.

She’s pregnant with his twins, and catches him in the act, having sex with another woman

Spath TalesEditor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call “Janeen.”

I was in an on again off again abusive (physically and mentally) relationship for the past year with a narcopath. He had numerous online accounts and profiles on dating sites where he would find women that he could lie to about who he was, what he did, how many kids he had … everything.

The only truth he told was his name.

I found this out the hard way; I was one of those women. We had met online and within a month I was living with him in a different city, an hour and a half away from my friends and family.

He would start arguments with outlandish accusations every time I went back home to visit my son or family. I was always accused of cheating on him, when in fact, it was him that was cheating.

Con man Tony Stratos scams Eddie Murphy’s ex-wife out of $7 million

TonyStratos

Tony Stratos

Career con man Tony Stratos — whose real name is Troy Stafford, although he has multiple aliases — will soon be going to trial after stealing $7 million from Nicole Murphy, ex-wife of actor Eddie Murphy.

Nicole knew Stratos since they were teenagers. When she got a $15 million settlement in her divorce from Eddie Murphy, Stratos told her he could invest the money for her overseas and she would earn a high rate of return.

Stratos never invested the money. He spent it on gambling and financing his extravagant lifestyle.

Nicole Murphy wasn’t his only victim. Stratos was recently convicted of an $11 million fraud involving Facebook stock. He also defrauded multiple other men and women.

EXCLUSIVE: Eddie Murphy’s ex-wife Nicole Murphy tells of ‘nightmare’ $7 million fraud by high-living conman who is finally going to trial – five years after his arrest, on DailyMail.co.uk.

10 translations of ‘I love you,’ when spoken by a sociopath

Authentic affection or a sociopath?Most sociopaths are really good at proclaiming their love. They often say the words “I love you” so quickly that it surprises us — how can they already feel that way? We just met!

When we question them, they respond, “You’re the one I’ve been waiting for all my life,” or, “I just know that we’re perfect for each other,” or something equally endearing.

We want to believe them, so we do. They keep pouring it on, until we fall in love with them. The big problem, however, is that our love is real and theirs is fake.

Sociopaths are incapable of love. Even though they sound sincere and convincing, they literally do not have the internal wiring that makes it possible for them to feel authentic love.

So when sociopaths say the words, “I love you,” what do they mean? Here are some possibilities:

Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, offers FREE online chat support group Sunday Aug. 28

Mary Ann GlynnExperience the support of people who know! Join our free online live chat support group next Sunday night, August 28, 8 pm EDT at www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com.  Share your struggles and get feedback, support, and hope from others who get it.  The group is professionally run.  Here’s how to join:

At 8 pm come to the site and scroll down the home page to the Services section. Click on the highlighted “live chat support group,” and you will be brought to the chat room as a Guest#.

Hope to see you there!