10 Reasons why sociopaths really are losers

Pimp con man 200x300If you’re struggling to get over an encounter with a sociopath — whether a romantic relationship or some other involvement — keep this in mind: They are losers.

They are not worth any emotional energy that you are spending on them, or any pain that you feel. Here’s 10 reasons why:

 1 Sociopaths cannot love the way you do

The root of serious personality disorders — antisocial, narcissistic, borderline and psychopathy — is an impaired ability to love. These people cannot feel empathy like you do. They are not interested in caregiving – a critical component of real love. People diagnosed as antisocials or  psychopaths are not capable of love at all.

2. Sociopaths cannot be trusted

What do sociopaths really want in life? Power and control. Their objective is always to win – whatever that may look like at the moment. So they always have an ulterior motive, and for that reason, can never be trusted.

3. Sociopaths are empty inside

They have no real passion. Oh, they may have temporary obsessions, but they do not care deeply about any person, thing, place or ideal. Without any real depth, they are caricatures of human beings, cardboard cut-outs, creatures without substance.

4. Sociopaths have no real friends

They have minions. They have co-conspirators. They have dupes. But because of items 1, 2 and 3 above, sociopaths do not have friends. They really are alone in the world. It’s sad.

5. Sociopaths have no real family

Yes, they have parents, spouses, children and relatives (possibly including you), but no one involved will feel a sense of family. The sociopath will just take advantage of relatives, and any relatives who are not themselves disordered will feel abused.

6. Sociopaths’ schemes fall apart

They’re always coming up with get-rich-quick schemes, grandiose plans that depend on other people’s money. Sometimes the plans never get off the ground. Sometimes they get started, and then sputter to a halt. Sooner or later, sociopathic schemes usually fail.

7. Sociopaths have financial problems

Even when they have a job or profession, they often have financial problems. They get fired. They lose contracts. They get sued. But often when there’s a money crisis, other people pay, not them.

8. Sociopaths have legal problems

Many sociopaths are criminals. In fact the definitions of antisocial personality disorder and psychopathy refer to criminal behavior. But even those who aren’t arrested for crimes are frequently involved lawsuits, divorces and child custody battles. None of this really bothers the sociopaths, but it will bother you.

9. Sociopaths crash and burn

Sociopaths may race along for awhile, living on the edge – maybe even for years. But at some point, their unconscionable behavior tends to catch up with them. Their financial empires collapse. They end up estranged from everyone in their lives. They may finally be arrested. Sooner or later, for many sociopaths, it all falls apart.

10. Sociopaths tend to die earlier

Promiscuous sex, drugs, crime, violence – this is how many sociopaths live. Whether it’s health problems, accidents from risky behavior or angering the wrong person, many sociopaths end up dead. And those who don’t may suffer a lonely old age. If anyone takes care of them, it’s because of a sense of duty, although I don’t think it’s warranted.

If you’re struggling to break the bonds you feel with a sociopath, refer to this list. Really, they are not worth the aggravation.

78 Comments on "10 Reasons why sociopaths really are losers"

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  1. Orion says:

    4,6,7,8, and 9 aren’t true. I know this narrows the list down to five things, four if you don’t count #10(It’s kinda iffy) but sociopaths are capable of emoting. Just not in the same way as you. Sociopaths can have friends, but it’s less loving friendship, more of a strong bond of not wanting to lose the person and knowing that the person is good. Just because your reality isn’t the same as their reality doesn’t mean their reality doesn’t exist. As for legal, financial, and ‘scheme’ problems- well there isn’t always a problem. Lot’s of people make it to the top of the chain who have sociopathic tendencies and do better than most people. (Woah, low key the President is possibly a sociopath, I’ll get back to you on that one but he’s a billionaire) their schemes more often than not actually don’t fall apart. If they get sloppy in a relationship, or something maybe? But what some people call ‘falling apart’ is a sociopaths way of saying ‘I dont need this person anymore’ You broke up? Maybe not because their scheme fell apart, probably because they don’t need you anymore and they got bored( or because you are a jerk, or because they genuienly wanted to just end things). They stopped being your friend? Probably because you’re a jerk or they don’t need you anymore and they got bored. A smart sociopath can finesse their way to the top without anyone noticing.

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  2. Ria says:

    Strange now looking back. My ex had no friends. I just thought because he was 68 yrs old he was living a lonely existence. I should of looked much closer at this lonely existence. Own Home, Car, Retired, and No friends…Mmm one sister he was not close to, always bad mouthed her. Oh well Ladies the Truth is usually in front of us but we are So Empathic and friendly heartfelt souls we don’t See what could be so Wrong. I found Viagra hiding in his bedroom drawer underneath hats and gloves and Condoms when I was his house. We have an Intuition! Lets Use that Intuition More!

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  3. Ria says:

    He must of been in a hurry to do the deed on one of his escapades as he ended up with Genital Herpes. A 68 yr old seriously!

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  4. mbinwc says:

    I wish I had known 17-1/2 years ago that there was such a person as a sociopath. Oh, I had heard that word but always thought it pertained to only criminal types. I watch Dr. Phil daily and I don’t believe I’ve ever heard him use this word even when dealing with cheaters and other assorted liars on his show. I always wanted to believe the best in people and thought my “jerk radar” would catch on earlier as to what I was dealing with. But if I’m honest with myself, I really thought/believed that the guy I was involved with could never be that type of monster. But constant lies, inconsistencies, behavior contradicting his words, you name it, put me through hell. I blocked his number but the damn voicemail messages still come through, and since he’s “surprised”me at the front door in the past, I’m on edge this will occur again. But I’m determined to stick to my “guns” and avoid him no matter what. I only hope others will pay attention to their “little voice” to not get taken in by this kind of monster. He’s also nearly 68 so this crap happens at any age.

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    • Ria says:

      In the beginning they come across as a fake self confident, charming, even mirror us to reel us in to think they are normal like us. The truth is what we find much later on. Sadly for all of us we find the monster behind the mask when we did not expect it. They can only hold up the facade for so long until the mask drops. It’s a terrible shock when this happens. It leaves us wondering what the hell happened? We will never get closure. The hoovering happens when we shut the door finally on all the chaos and craziness. Going No Contact blocking his number etc is the only way to build a new life. Your so right their age doesn’t matter they are who they are. Immature, chaotic impulsive with no empathy and never accepts Responsibilty for their actions, projection, mind games, the list goes on…. Being Free is the only way out of the Craziness. Hugs to you xx

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  5. trustingKat says:

    I would say that I have seen the crash and burn, or rather heard that it happened. I was engaged to a psychopath 11 years ago and when it ended, the discard phase was unbearable for me. My friend, a psychic, met this ex not knowing who he was, and had a flash that in ten years he would have spiraled so low in his life that he would not even be able to comprehend how he got there – no money, no family, no friends.
    I was skeptical, as at the time my ex had millions, a lovely family, and decent friends (not many but educated persons around him).
    10 years later I heard that he had a child with a drug addict mother who abandoned them, that he himself became a drug addict, lost his money, home, family stopped speaking with him, and the child he had was kept by the mother’s family.
    He couldn’t keep up the lies and deceit so he definitely crashed! It’s a long time to wait, and I was out and over it way before it happened – and to be honest, I felt sorry for him. I wondered if it was Karma, or if it would have happened whether or not I was with him still…I’m glad I’m not with him of course, but as an empath I still feel sorry for someone else’s suffering.

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    • Ria says:

      Wow when you mentioned your psychic friend. My psychic friend asked to see me asap after meeting the ex and said “Maria your not being told the truth he is hiding something from you”. I always felt something wasn’t right but couldn’t put my finger on it. Little did I know he was leading a double life. It was a long distance relationship so I was non the wiser until he was hiding an STD from me on holiday! The game was up when he had to see a doctor in Malta ( he asked me to wait outside) and he prescribed him Aciclovir 800mg 5 times a day. He led me to believe it was back pain Ha! Until I discovered it for myself when I took the blanket off him and seen the sores! The Shock!! Back pain my foot! He was nothing more than a Liar and a Cheat! The distance kept him safe to do as he pleased. 119 miles distance from my home to his. Lesson learned.

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      • trustingKat says:

        I do hope you were not infected, and he suffered loads! It is interesting that psychics can “see” or sense more clearly what we are only just intuitive about – and then we sometimes ignore it because we just so much prefer to trust in people…we hope our bad feelings are wrong, and that the person is actually GOOD. But the first person we should always trust, is ourselves…

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  6. trustingKat says:

    And to add another story to the previous one – I fell victim again to a sociopath more recently. Met him as a dreamy charmer a few months ago and he quickly got me to get him a credit card on my account. His promises to pay never happened, and in fact he gave me a false bank account number to try and pay it – which had the card cancel the entire account due to the fraud (which luckily was in his name, but still, I lost a credit card account that I had held for 30 years).

    This sociopath feeds money off his victim, using fake financial schemes that collect in the millions. Private jets, expensive hotels, designer clothes and jewelry – I lost around $100K to this man in just two short months, not realising until it was too late that he had no intention to ever pay me anything.

    I threatened a lawsuit and he started to threaten the lawyer and myself directly.

    So…will this sociopath crash and burn? Probably. He leads a risky life, works with law enforcement with false badges, pilot and such – the financial fraud alone will catch up and he’ll have to move again to find another location to source for income. Maybe it will be another 10 years, doesn’t really help with my situation right now, but I suppose to know he won’t make it very far does help.

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    • Ria says:

      That’s terrible! This monster left you in so much debt and having to recover your own financial worthiness to your bank. I can’t imagine how this must of felt for you. All your hard earned money gone through a con man! My heart goes out to you it really does. My story is nothing compared to yours I was able to walk away free from any further chaos. How you must be feeling right now is indescribable. To be left with so much financial loss must be awful. Love and Hugs to you xx

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      • trustingKat says:

        Very kind of you Ria – but money can be re-earned, whereas my heart has been singed and maybe scarred – hard to trust again, yet it will heal in time. I’m working things out on the finance side, I have been “getting him back” in subtle ways, like reporting his financial scheme to the SEC, and the fraud investment attempt to the FBI. Local restaurants, bars, and hotels have been notified that he cons people while in their establishments, so now they turn him away. He keeps very little in his own name, but I have been able to track down many names associated with him. I even found jewelry that he said he bought for me (on my card account) at a reseller that ironically in our “honeymoon” period he asked me to “shop online” for something for myself (which i picked out and never got ) but when I went back online, I saw the same jewelry he had purchased on my card, available at this reseller! – exactly the same as on the invoice, so I’ve already notified the reseller about him, buying stolen goods and selling them off. Sure, he’ll probably just find another reseller, but Socios hate to be exposed, so he will be anxious – and the other people that work with him, if they are “in” on it, will suffer or have to turn him in, so I think in time it will crash on him at least financially, and maybe some time in jail for fraud too. Somehow, it always catches up.

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        • Sunnygal says:

          I was involved with what I would say was a sexual psychopath. He did well financially, was a stock market investor and mutual fund manager. Took good care of himself financially. He was emotionally/sexually exploitive, couldm’t love. His crash will be emotional.

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  7. Sunnygal says:

    I had a narcissistic drug addict neighbor who was disturbing others and he was evicted. I have another narcissistic neighbor who is O.K. for awhile then becomes offensive again. I would like to see her evicted.

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  8. Sunnygal says:

    I am in a situation where I have to deal with a narcissist. I am dealing by shifting the focus to a very nice mutual friend.

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