lf1

Archive for October, 2015

How to work with your brain to so you can feel better

4 steps to happiness

Image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Dealing with sociopaths — and the havoc they create — crushes your sense of wellbeing, mood, self-esteem, confidence and happiness. In short, sociopaths make you miserable.

Sometimes all you want is to feel better.

Eric Barker wrote an article on BusinessInsider.com about how to feel happier. He summarized the work of multiple neuroscientists to come up with four steps you can take that will improve your outlook. They are:

  1. Ask “What am I grateful for?”
  2. Label negative emotions
  3. Make a decision
  4. Touch someone

These aren’t just “feel good” platitudes — the suggestions are based on what affects your brain.

Take these steps and you just might start to feel better. And that will enable you to deal with the havoc.

A neuroscience researcher reveals 4 rituals that will make you happier, on BusinessInsider.com.

Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, offers online chat support group Sunday November 1

Mary Ann GlynnBy Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW

If you would like to chat with others who have been in relationships with sociopaths, feel free to join our live chat group on Sunday November 1 at 8 pm EST. 

To join the live chat at go to www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com. Scroll down the home page to the Services section. Click on the highlighted “live chat support group,” and you will be brought to the chat room as a Guest#. Hope to see you there!

Q&A with Jaqueline Kraft Bruno, Intuitive Life Coach and Reiki Master

Jaqueline Kraft BrunoLovefraud is pleased to introduce the newest member of the Lovefraud Professional Resources Guide, Jacqueline Kraft Bruno. Jacqueline is an Intuitive Life Coach, Reiki Master and survivor of narcissistic abuse. 

What experience have you had dealing with sociopaths or other disordered personalities—personally, professionally, or both?

Professionally, my experience includes working in substance abuse treatment. As a counselor, I worked with addicts and their families of all ages. I have worked in out patient and in-patient programs and as an Interventionist in private practice.

Many of my co-workers were aware of the disordered people in their families prior to beginning their careers. I was a late bloomer. I realized these disorders were prevalent in my own family as I worked with families and addiction. I was the “scapegoat” in my family, and I had come to believe that I deserved the label in my youth, but as a result of therapy and sobriety I was now a changed woman. My responses to people, who were disordered that I came across in my field, were automatic. I would fall into a pattern of behavior that was not aligned with my beliefs. I was displaying co-dependant behaviors and attitudes, towards disordered people especially.

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Is he blind to the fact that he exploits and manipulates?

Pimp con man 200x300Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we’ll call “Clara.”

My ex friend, after lying, abusing, manipulating everyone has now found himself in a whirlwind of trouble.

Owes everyone in town, credit card issues, issues with every law agency known to man, IRS, trouble with his two previous ex wives, etc.

Is now going around saying to everyone what goes around comes around, everyone is out to get him, he can’t win or get ahead, no one has any sympathy or empathy for him.

He “tries” to be a decent caring guy. Except he fails to mention he pathologically lied to everyone, stole money from people, was sleeping with other guys’ wives, carrying on with single women behind his wife’s back, screwing over clients left and right, never paying back anyone, is now saying he is religious…believes in God and in good and doesn’t understand why people are trying to destroy or ruin his life?

How to know if you were raised by a narcissist, and what to do about it

Raised by narcissistYou feel like a doormat, you are competitive with siblings, you have no sense of yourself. Worse yet, you can’t figure out why you feel the way you do.

An insightful article on Huffington Post, written by Anna Almendrala, suggests that your problem may not have originated with you, but with your parents. Maybe your parents were narcissists.

The article describes six ways you may feel or behave now, why your emotions or behaviors may be the result of a narcissistic parent, and how you can recover.

6 Signs you were raised by a narcissist, on Huffingtonpost.com.

Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.

 

 

 

He’s Russia’s richest man, and betrayed wife wants her share

Vladimir and Natalia Potanin.

Vladimir and Natalia Potanin.

Vladimir Potanin is worth £10 billion, according to Forbes magazine. He and his wife of 30 years are divorcing, and Natalia Potanin wants her share.

She doesn’t buy her husband’s story that he’s “down to his last millions.”

Vladimir Potanin dumped his wife for a younger woman, and they now have a child together.

Natalia says she will battle for justice, no matter how long it takes, according to the Daily Mail.

‘Dumped, betrayed, and humiliated’: Ex-wife of Russia’s richest oligarch who had secret mistress and love child on her fight for his £10 BILLION fortune, on DailyMail.co.uk.

 

Posted in: Media sociopaths

After the sociopath, I still feel numb — what can I do?

 

Lovefraud recently received the following email from a reader:

It has been about 3 years since I discovered what happened to me. I’ve had no contact with my spaths. Yet I still feel so numb and broken. I feel like I have tried almost everything to get through this dark time. I feel so lost. I feel so robbed of my life and my children have been too. What can I do now? I’m running out of solutions. I don’t want to feel like this anymore…. please suggest something for me.

Many, many Lovefraud readers have had this experience. I know I did.

Overwhelmed

When you first realize the magnitude of your betrayal by a sociopath, you are overwhelmed. At the very least, the sociopath has deceived and manipulated you. This individual may have also stolen from you, assaulted you, smeared your name and perhaps even tried to kill you.

Debi Mason predicted Joseph Morrison, her longtime boyfriend, would kill her

Joseph Morrison

Joseph Morrison (Atlantic County Justice Facility)

Today I sat down for breakfast and opened the the local newspaper, the Press of Atlantic City. The headline was:

Mother suspected she would be killed.

“Oh no,” I thought. “Another one.”

Last year, on the night before Thanksgiving, Joseph Morrison, 62, shot Debi Mason, 52, in the home they shared in Mays Landing, New Jersey.

Then he smoked a cigarette as he watched her die.

Previously Mason had told her daughter, “If I come up dead, you know who to go after.”

Morrison was sentenced to 18 years in prison for murder.

Mays Landing man gets 18 years in killing of longtime girlfriend, on PressofAtlanticCity.com.

Mays Landing man charged with murder in killing of woman he lived with, on PressofAtlanticCity.com.

 

 

Posted in: Cases

He knew her for 20 years, but didn’t know she was a lying, cheating sociopath

 

ManEditor’s note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we’ll call “Jesse.”

I’m so saddened by the events from the past 5 months it pains me to relive them.

I’m just trying to move on.

I saw someone I know but really wasn’t close to her. We saw each other a few times in the past 20 years, just a hello she was always smiling and happy, shy.

My close friends knew her also but not close either.

So we went out one afternoon to catch up on our lives since we knew each other.

Funny looking back how our lives were exactly the same, or so I was being “mirrored” well. Quickly we were in Love. She was living at her parents, sleeping on the couch.

No real job. So I moved her in, she rushed us engaged in 2 months.

What I, as a Highly Sensitive Person, learned the hard way about sociopaths

 

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following email froma reader who posts as “emotionallyraped.” She previously wrote the blog post “Highly Sensitive People are perfect targets for sociopaths.”

Obviously, anyone with a conscience is a potential victim for the sociopath.

Among people with a conscience, I would say a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) would be the easiest to detect, right?

So, if HSP’s are more easily spotted among the population with conscience, then would you agree that HSP’s are likely a sociopath’s most common target?

Assuming you agree, would it not make sense that socios would be experts at feigning the emotions and actions of Highly Sensitive People, since they have more experience with HSP’s?

While I originally set out to provide sociopathic red flags for any new encounter with a stranger, it dawned on me … a lot of the red flags could possibly describe myself or my HSP friends.