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Red Flags of Love Fraud: Best ever book on sociopathy

Well, let me say it outright: Donna Andersen’s latest book, Red Flags of Love Fraud, is hands-down the best book I’ve ever read on the subject of who sociopaths are, everything you need to know about them, and everything you need to know to reduce your risk of being violated by them.

What a riveting book this is. I had a seriously hard putting it down, and never did for long. Andersen intermixes comprehensive information about every aspect of the sociopath’s tendencies and modus operandi, with countless fascinating, concise case examples of sociopaths exhibiting their behaviors—that is, showing exactly what they look like—and how their victims experience their transgressions.

At the heart of this fantastic book are Andersen’s ten “red flag” signs that you are involved with a sociopath. The signs she identifies are spot-on, and explained and developed with her usual unmatched clarity and captivating narrative skills.

It’s no exaggeration, nor is it grandiose, to say that reading this book will make of you an “expert” about sociopaths—it’s really that comprehensively informative. But again, the book’s greater accomplishment is to arm you with every applicable tool and insight available to identify the sociopath and jettison him or her from your life, before he or she upends yours.

By now we know that Donna Andersen knows sociopaths as intimately and completely as anyone out there; my personal view is that she writes about them, and educates about them, as she does in this, her newest, spellbinding book, like no one out there.



41 Comments on "Red Flags of Love Fraud: Best ever book on sociopathy"

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  1. G1S says:

    There are a few differences, Donna, but you’re right, not in the sense of what you’re up against or dealing with from the P.

    The differences lie with the observers/other people.

    If you’re not a blood relative of the P(s,) observers/other people have no problem with you getting rid of the SOBs. In fact, they’ll often encourage you to do just that. Dump them. Why do you associate with those people? Why don’t you get better friends?

    If you are a blood relative of the P(s,) then you are pressured to make up with them, forgive them, get over it, “re-establish” family harmony, love them because they’re family, mend the discord, stop being the holdout etc.

    Also, because they are blood relatives (the Ps,) people will often assume that “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” and if you’re coming from the same environment as the P(your family of origin,) then you must be just like the P or equally dysfunctional in some way.

    You couldn’t possibly see things or act differently than your family of origin or the P. How many people talk about the families of Ps being victims? No, it’s “the whole family is screwed up.”

    In particular, if your family of P(s) does something to you, the assumption is often that they know you better and that you must have done something to deserve this treatment from your family. Your family knows you best.

    I think an individual who is not a blood relative of P who is victimized gets much more understanding, sympathy, support, and help than anyone who is a blood relative of a P.

    It’s a double-whammy for victims who are also blood relatives of Ps.



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  2. Ox Drover says:

    Dear Mother of a mutha

    It is oxdrover1946 at g mail dot com….it should be listed there under my bio. and picture.

    I have thought several times about writing a book and targeting the audience who are parents/relatives/spouses of inmates in prison.

    The “system” HIGHLY AND HEAVILY ENCOURAGES families to be “supportive of” and visit the inmates and take them back into their homes when they get out. They quote all these STATISTICS that show that inmates who have families do better on the outside.

    Well, “statistics” can “prove” anything…a man with one foot on a red hot stove and one on a block of ice is STATISTICALLY COMFORTABLE.

    Only 40% of inmates complete their paroles without a new felony that puts them back in the hands of the law.

    In Arkansas an “ex” convict is NEVER busted on a technical problem with his parole, he or she must commit a new crime, and they know that so they tell their PO to fark off and do what they want to, knowing they will not be returned to prison for flunking a drug test or not showing up for a visit with their PO.

    The JC Dugard deal where her abductor’s parole officers showed up at the house but never went in and she was there for nearly 2 decades and his PO didn’t know it. DUH????

    25% of all inmates are psychopaths according to Robert Hare’s PCL-R check list and score 30 or above on that test. The AVERAGe rate (meaning that half score higher than 22, and half lower means that at least half the psychopaths are pretty darn close to being psychopaths. If you chart the scores on the bell curve, MOST PEOPLE IN PRISON ARE VERY HIGH IN PSYCHOPATHIC TRAITS and it is only the RARE individual who is truly going to “repent” and learn from prison and stay the heck out of trouble when he gets out so while it may be HELPFUL TO THE SYSTEM to have the families take them into their homes (and cheaper for the system) it is not going to be helpful to the families to have this person high in P traits back in their home….as my husband’s niece found out when she took in my poor son Patrick after his first two years in jail because “his mother was too harsh and didn’t understand him, poor baby” well he was only at her house 5 months before he killed a girl….she really showed me what care and concern for him would do, huh?

    I have several people in my community that I know who have psychopathic sons in prison right now, and I’ve known these men since they were kids, and I have no doubt that they are psychopaths, but their mommies and daddies are not going to give up on their blood sons. Just got to keep on Praying because God can do anything! So there is not a chance in hades that I will reach either of these families with my message of “your son is a psychopath and there is no hope for him.” They do NOT want to hear it. They can’t hear it. The system, their churches and their emotions are against what I have to say to them. I feel like “John the Baptist, crying in the wilderness…repent and go no contact, for your sons are psychopaths!”



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  3. callmeathena says:

    Skylar. Great post. The way i see it, we are the sowers. We spread seeds of joy and happiness and love. If it takes root, its because of the conditions of the seed. It has nothing to do with the sower.



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  4. callmeathena says:

    Slimone. Yeah sister.

    I too honestly believed all people are good.

    Jokes on me!

    When i first met my spath i realized he didnt trust me. I couldnt understand why. I wrote so many emails about it. I learned now the trusthworthy people trust people, and the reverse is also true.

    I was duped.



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  5. anam cara says:

    My spath radar is “buzzing” today.

    Article in the Daily Mail 23/04/12 “How To Spot If Your Lover Is A Psycho”

    Relates to “Is There a Psycho In Your Life?” by Jessica Fellowes & Kerry Daynes



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