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By December 14, 2011 47 Comments Read More →

A Bridge to Hope

Editor’s note: The following article refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud’s statement on Spiritual Recovery.

This is the second in a series of 6 postings on spiritual healing that will attempt to Make Sense of these encounters with sociopaths and present the process that literally turns these painful experiences into Miracles of Healing.

“There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance – that principle is contempt prior to investigation”

-Herbert Spencer-

The Bridge of Hope

Forgive is one of the most misunderstood words in the English language. In fact, many people recoil at the very thought of forgiving someone that they believe has harmed them.  The act of forgiveness does not release the perpetrator or sociopath from responsibility for their crimes, nor condone the behavior. Forgiveness is about Letting Go, a process that releases US from another’s destructive hold over our lives.

Refusing to be open-minded about the “possible” healing power of forgiveness only strengthens the sociopaths hold over our lives and poisons every relationship that we are in.

Based on previous experience, some will find this particular reading extremely difficult to accept and understand, but open-mindedness is all that is needed to learn the Truth.

Many of us understand why forgiveness is important and the profound affects that it can have on our lives and the lives of those around us, but few know how to do it. Most, however, know very little about the sometimes devastating physical illnesses and damaged relationships that are caused by our inability to let go of the past.

For most of us, the real meaning and power of forgiveness (letting go) is completely foreign.  We “think” we know, but we do not.  True forgiveness is Divine.  Grace is promised to us all from our Creator.

If we are to begin to understand the miraculous healing power of forgiveness, we must first be willing to at least entertain this idea that our creator can help us with this process.  A simple willingness to believe is all that’s needed to begin.

God is either everything, or he is nothing.  This is the question that we all must answer for ourselves.  For many, this step becomes the first real attempt to answer the question of God within themselves.  You will not need anyone else’s opinion of God for this exercise, only an open mind and willing heart.  He will do the rest if you ask, and then you will know.

We often use our very denial of God as proof that He does not exist.  We have little or no real Faith in God’s power, then, we use our experience to convince ourselves he does not exist.  Or worse yet, that He does exist, but doesn’t care about “me”.

Wherever there is despair, depression, anger, resentment, and fear, you will find a lack of Faith.  We are not talking about the surface Faith that pretends to believe in God, but the deep peace that comes from trusting God.  Faithlessness is not the result of these human difficulties, but rather the cause.

The Truth is in us, and when we hear it, we recognize it as Truth.  We may choose to deny Truth, but our hearts will always know.  This process helps us begin to trust this inner Devine wisdom and allows us to be guided through the healing process that results in a relationship with God that we never imagined possible.

Seek and You Shall Find, Ask and It Shall be Given You, is one of the promises.  God will never deny us Truth, but if we avoid asking the question, we can deny the answer.

Freedom from the past requires that we first surrender to what already is.   Then, we must become willing to acknowledge that there is a power greater than ourselves that can free us from this suffering.

This can be a difficult task for those of us that believe God has “allowed” a sociopath to harm us.  If we are refusing to let go of something and judging it as wrong, while claiming to believe in God, then we are conflicted, and in most cases, secretly blaming Him for whatever we think has harmed us.

For most of us, we must first recognize that we have begun to view God as the enemy, before we can become willing to see Him as the answer to the problems that we “thought” He was causing.

This is a question for quiet prayer and meditation.  A willingness to do this will give you the answer to this question.  An unwillingness to try this exercise will also answer the question prior to asking.  The Truth will always be revealed when we ask.  Failure to ask is simply a reflection of unwillingness to seek Truth.

If you are not yet convinced, you may want to sit quietly and ask God in prayer if He loves you, and if he will help you with this process before moving on.

Find a place where you can be alone uninterrupted for a few minutes.  If possible, find a place outdoors that is peaceful and quiet, or, try to imagine a beautiful, lush green garden surrounded by trees.  Sit peacefully in the middle of the Garden.  Try to quiet your mind by focusing on your breathing.  Ask God for help as you take nice, long, deep controlled breathes through your nose deep into your body while you attempt to clear your thoughts.

Ask this question or one similar.

“Father, do you love me and are you here to help me overcome my difficulties?”

Sit as quietly and as long as you possibly can, or until the answer is felt to your satisfaction.  This may only take a few minutes, or it may take longer.  When your mind wanders, simply ask the question again.

Next week we’ll discuss how to begin to Trust this new relationship and process.

 



47 Comments on "A Bridge to Hope"

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  1. Ox Drover says:

    Dear Myheart,

    It sounds like you have “let go” of the former pain, and are making progress toward healing yourself

    For so long I didn’t get it that it STARTED about “them” but ends up being about OURSELVES. Now I do. Now I take care of ME first. Sounds like you are taking care of YOU too. TOWANDA!!!!



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  2. myheart says:

    Thanks Ox for your kind words.

    I can say one thing happened since I sent that email, that I have nothing to say, nothing to go in past “what if”, which has relaxed my brain by 90%.

    Yes forgiveness is about ourselves not about them, I made the point about his going made the positive difference in my life, because he saw how negative my life was when he was around. His leaving is a key here.

    This is the message I want to give here, we all grew emotionally. We are survivors, and to survive a spath disaster path, we all need to work harder and differently.



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  3. blossom4th says:

    Just doing some reading …and WOW!I thought this was a great article to help those who are “stuck” in the anger stage,and wanting to get beyond;to heal.



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  4. Tea Light says:

    Blossom, you’re bumping up some gems this week! Thanks! x



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