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Police fail to act on 102 warnings of abuse

A teenager from Wales is dead—killed by her father, after her mother contacted police 102 times, worried that the girl was being abused.

An Independent Police Complaints Commission report stated that although the police failed to act according to ‘best practices,” their inaction had no impact on the murder.

Read this outrageous story at Police ignored mother’s 102 warnings her daughter was being abused by her father … who then stabbed the teenager to death on Dailymail.co.uk.

Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.



26 Comments on "Police fail to act on 102 warnings of abuse"

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  1. Merr5923

    I am so glad the police helped you. You are very lucky – it doesn’t always happen that way.



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  2. shojo170 says:

    Survior Lady,

    I am sorry for your troubles even though you have done the right thing and stayed away. I have been in your situation many times with the same man and although we feel scared, we can’t let their antics interfere with our life. Protecting yourself can give you peace of mind though; someone suggested a camera, alarms are good, and even weapons (safetly kept) will help. I am sure you have been here before and for some reason it feels scarier when we are no longer with them than when they are angrily screaming in our face with fists clenched. Remember these sicko’s feed off causing fear in others, so make sure he does not get encouraged by your reaction. There are scarier things to face being a single mother, right. Survivor Lady just try not to scare yourself with “what if’s”, take actions to protect you and your children, and stay strong. Also record phone calls or txts and this could give him a reason to be served with another order or protection or go to jail so that you can prove to him you are not taking it. I completely understand your situation and my children and I have done our best to stay normal and positive, but there were definately times when I did not want to let them play outside or had thoughts of changing jobs because I had to be outside by myself at dark. This too shall pass! Seek God and his infinite wisdom, understanding, and blessings!



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  3. Ox Drover says:

    Dear Survivorlady,

    Shojo has some good advice for you, and mine goes right along with it, don’t live in TERROR, but protect yourself. Keep strong in your faith and support your kids in this because they are also suffering (which is what he intended) but your children are fortunate in that they don’t buy what he is selling and they have YOU!!! Hopefully this will keep them from being victims of psychopaths in the future. Educate them on the “Llove bombs” and the “red flags” to learn to spot them before the devaluation and the stalking. That is the most important life education they can have. (((hugs)))) and God bless.



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  4. stillinshock says:

    survivorlady – your story resonates with me also.

    My spath has a terrible rage. He had it when I first met him although he hid it well for quite a while. I found out he had it because his mother told me one time. Now all his rage is turned towards me. I am the sole party responsible for destroying his life. He tells our daughter that continuously. He has shared custody. He tells her I am a bad mom. That I am a slut. He tries to make her choose between us.

    He uses anger to control. He throws things. Holes in the walls. Kicked my bedroom door in. Kicked the cat. Screams at the cat.

    Seems he is ramping up. And I am getting worried for my daughter. She is hitting her teens, and no longer malleable to his ideas and manipulations. He does not like to be disagreed with.

    I too have no idea how to keep us safe, when I cannot even get the courts to take him seriously. I was able to get a P.O. but that was in a different county. The county the divorce case and child custody is in is terribly backwards as far as abuse.

    They think I am vengeful and spiteful. I have no idea what they base that on, except his lies. He has shown no proof. I thought you needed “hard copy” proof.

    I also called my advocate. They said I can try to get a P.O. against him for my daughter, but without physical abuse that can be terribly difficult. They won’t really do anything until it is too late.

    And, if I do succeed in getting her a P.O., it will only make him angrier, and feeling the loss of control, more likely to strike out even worse. And I do not think he will do anything himself….his M.O. is to manipulate others to do his dirty work. He has had friends and family stalking me, until they wised up.

    If he decides to take us out, I won’t see it coming. Because it won’t be him.



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  5. survivorlady says:

    Dear Stillinshock, we for sure have many similiarities, and it is quite sad how these monsters are in our lives, and when kids are involved…more so.My kids are 14 and 18 and they have seen, heard, and assessed.Your daughter is younger and so much more impressionable, and this is what your ex is banking on. I find it hard to believe that in 2010 we are still battling the courts in terms of seeming sane. Sometimes the more we say the worse it seems, they really do think we are crazy at times, “overreacting”. Keep on telling your daughter that you love her, and I truly believe that your spath will one day do something that will enlighten her. I am not sure how old she is, but that is what happened to my daughter, she was 16 when she suddenly woke up, saw her Dad kick in the door, and immediatly thought he was “not quite right upstairs”. She made up her mind the next day that her Dad needed help, and if she felt frightened of him, that was not a normal feeling. I did not say much on that, because she was right on. And as her father was making more and more violent gestures, she made her decision that he was not a father only into himself, and she did not want contact with him. On another occassion after my ex moved out, he came back for more violent attacks and after hitting me my son calling 911, my son made his decision that his Dad was not quite right, and also made his decision of no contact. My ex left messages on the answering machine and they were violent, obscene words at the kids for not responding to his calls….I taped it and took it to my lawyer, just in case. My ex never did attempt for custody….did not even try, knew it was a lost cause, he was more concerned about the property. They will give up on the kids if they feel they have lost their way into their “soul”.
    As a result, my ex discarded the kids and kids never forget that they were discarded. His loss and my gain. So my ex;s stupid moves did him in, not me, not my words, nothing I did could have made him look any worse, he did a fine job all my himself. Protect yourself, record the messages, take digitals of things that are not quite right, it will all come into place. Until the kids are young you need to be a pace ahead of him, try to know what he is up to, its actually easy to do, becasue they think they are so smart, that they can become real stupid. Listen to what your children are saying and act on anything that you feel is suspicous, consult a domestic violence group for advise.I found that womens help groups are much more helpful than police, police wait till the violence take place, the help groups try to prevent the violence. Check to see what is available in your area.
    You need to understand that their mental abuse is worse than physcial,they play on the kids mind, and that is abuse.
    Start making a plan, for your kids and your sanity, because they need you, without you your daughter will belong to him.
    Take care, we cannot control him, but you can control your own plan. Be proactive. Take care, and we are here if you need us.



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  6. Ox Drover says:

    Dear Survivorlady,

    Your advice to stillinshock is right on! The support we get and give here makes me want to cry sometimes in gratitude for what LF makes available to us. WE ARE NOT ALONE in this, there ARE others that do understand.

    TOWANDA! SL!!!!!

    Stillinshock, hang in there….do the best you can, that is all a jack ass can do! You can’t pull a load heavier than you can pull, so don’t kick yourself if you can’t pull it. I think most of us have tried to pull the loads all by ourselves and sometimes they are just too heavy to move even for a team of draft horses! We don’t have to let them beat us and we don’t for sure need to beat ourselves! (((Hugs)))) I think S-lady is right, he will undermine himself with the kids if they are ever to get it, by trying to warn them, you only make yourself look “bad” and they will defend him—sort of like a teen-aged romance, it will run its course if you just let it go. Hopefully the damage will be minimal!



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  7. stillinshock says:

    Thanks…..she is a very bright 12 year old. She has already figured him out. She doesn’t want to see him anymore, however, we are too scared to go to court just yet, because if she tells the judge what she wants and the judge denies her…..it will be ten times worse when she has to go back to her dads.

    We are waiting for him to seal his own fate, basically……or we are hoping he just gets tired of her not being the perfect little daughter that lovingly agrees with everything he says, and loses interest in her. I would rather it be his idea to stop seeing her…..he does tell her from time to time that he knows she doesn’t like him, and then he breaks down and cries! But he just doesn’t understand that she gets tired of his anger and him blaming me for everything, calling me names, complaining to everyone that will listen about me…..and she also gets upset when he screams or kicks the cats.

    I do have her in counseling, and I have talked with her a lot, and been honest with her. I don’t put him down, but I have started explaining mental illness a little, since she is now in Junior High. It seems to help her quite a bit to understand and not take any of it personally.



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  8. one_step_at_a_time says:

    stillinshock – if she is a very bright girl, and mature enough you can tell her a lot more than a bit about mental illness. I knew a great deal about some of my family members at that point, and i wish that i had known more.

    My only caution is that she might say something to him out of frustration or whatever about his true nature which could come back to harm her.

    you have my best wishes in this horrible situation.



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