Donna Andersen’s ‘Love Fraud, How Marriage to a Sociopath Fulfilled My Spiritual Plan’ is the third book in the last year I have read on sociopaths. Compared to the previous two it is not written by an academic, but rather by a victim of a sociopath.
The book is very well written for a first book, and the fictional style of writing, coupled with the matter-of-fact narrative makes it highly readable. Many of the people who would of have bought this book in the immediate aftermath of publication would have been refugees from Planet Sociopath themselves and much of the antics and personality traits of James Montgomery will strike a powerful resonance within them in regards to their own personal experience.
But even as sociopaths go, Montgomery is almost spectacular in terms of his proficiency and malicious drive to get what he wanted. Then again, perhaps James Montgomery is a typical sociopath and all sociopaths are this out of control and we never get to see this due to them covering their tracks so well. Donna Andersen kept detailed records and is a proficient archivist and investigator. Unlike most of us she opened a window into the world of her ex husband and even then concludes that she may have only had a peek inside and much, much more remains undetected.
This will make sober reading for sociopath victims as we turn the pages it becomes apparent just how much we might not know about our own sociopath’s predatorial web of deceit and lies we are oblivious to. But ultimately, no matter how slick and manipulative the predator is, it all ends in failure – as like all sociopaths Montgomery’s actions are typical of the sociopath’s life long death spiral into oblivion and decay. This is brought home in the beautifully composed Epilogue at the end of the book which leaves the reader feeling a sense of shared victory which we the collective victims of sociopaths all desire.
Some people may take issue with the New Age aspects of the story. I consider Donna Andersen’s spiritual outlook to no different than any other religious viewpoint, but having said this, I can see some strict traditional religious folks and atheist readers having difficulty with her beliefs. She is entitled to them and the reader should try to understand this. They should also bear in mind that victims of sociopaths cling to whatever gets them through the ‘dark night of the soul’ and if channelling spirit guides and looking at past lives works for them, then it is perfectly legitimate and deserves respect.
The only criticism I can give of the book is that it perhaps a bit too long and there could have been more information on sociopath’s common traits. This might have broadened the overall appeal of the book in terms of reaching people who have not been touched by sociopaths (yet!), but should be on the look out. Some of the parts were slightly over written I felt, such as the history of the Titanic could have been left out. Even though the metaphor of the “unsinkable” ship deliciously runs as an ironic thread through the remainder of the book. HMS Montgomery, the ship that in his own mind cannot be by sunk, ends up wrecked on the rocks of his own toxic coastline. As all sociopaths are destined to end their sorry lifetime’s trajectory of pernicious voyages though the lives of decent and kind people.
I very much enjoyed reading Love Fraud the book, and I admire Ms. Andersen’s courage and honesty in putting her experiences (some of which are deeply personal) out there. That takes guts, but after one has been to hell and back with a sociopath it becomes an obligation both to yourself and the world at large to spread the message about these sadistic predatory lunatics.
I myself feel there is a sort of psycho-spiritual revolution taking root in the world these days and the sociopaths are on the run. The One Hundred Monkey effect is generating a collective consciousness awareness and more and more people are waking up to Labyrinth of the Psychopath which so many of us are trapped into, often unknowingly so. ‘Love Fraud, How Marriage to a Sociopath Fulfilled My Spiritual Plan’ will just have the sociopaths running faster. The game is up. Thank you for writing this important book.