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By September 16, 2007 7 Comments Read More →

A close encounter with a sociopath changes everything

O.J. Simpson is in the news again. On Friday, Las Vegas police named him as a suspect in an armed robbery. The fallen football star was allegedly part of a group of men who entered a hotel room and took sports memorabilia that once belonged to Simpson. The facts of the incident—including whether or not weapons were involved—are currently being investigated by the police.

So here’s Simpson’s version of the story: He was running a sting operation to retrieve items that were stolen from him. He was in Las Vegas to attend a friend’s wedding, and got some guys he met at a cocktail party to go with him to the hotel room. He says there was no gun and nobody got “roughed up.”

According to a video report on MSNBC.com by Michael Okwu, “O.J. Simpson seems to be saying that none of these reports are true at all, and in fact he is playing the victim to some extent. He says that there was no robbery… He says that this was essentially a sting operation, that he had every right to go back to this place, to these people who were selling his items, items that were stolen from him and his family, in order to take them and do as he sees fit.”

The video accompanying the report shows Simpson smiling and waving. He appears to be mugging for the cameras.

O.J. Simpson, of course, was acquitted of the 1994 murder of his wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend, Ronald Goldman. In 1997, a civil court jury found him liable for the deaths, and Simpson was ordered to pay the families $33.5 million in damages. He has paid very little of the court-ordered judgment.

Now, I see it

There was a time when I would have been mystified by Simpson’s behavior as reported in this story. Yes, Simpson has gotten away with murder in the criminal case, but he’s been found liable for the brutal death of his wife. How could he dare to show his face in public? Why was he drawing attention to himself? Why was he smiling and waving for the news cameras? Why was he granting an interview to the Associated Press?

But that was before my close encounter with a sociopath. Now, after having been married to a man who continually proclaimed his love for me while taking my money and cheating on me, I get it. I understand what Simpson is about. He’s a sociopath, displaying the personality disorder for all the world to see.

Simpson has no shame and no remorse. He wants to be in the spotlight. He feels entitled to take things that he says are his. He says he has every right to do as he sees fit.

This is all so typical of sociopathic behavior. Now, with my eyes painfully forced open, I see it.

Shedding light

There was a time when I thought if I worked hard, did the right thing, avoided the wrong crowd and didn’t walk alone at night, I’d stay out of trouble. There was a time when I thought I could believe a well-dressed, well-spoken man who said, “I love you” and proposed marriage.

A close encounter with a sociopath changes everything.

Now I know that sociopaths come in all demographic shapes and sizes. Now I know that the trappings of responsibility and authority do not necessarily mean that the person should be believed or respected. Millions of sociopaths are out there looking for people to prey on, and that knowledge has changed my view of the world. I recognize that there is a dark side to the human race, a dark side that sometimes masquerades as flattery, concern and even love.

I guess I’ve lost some innocence, but it’s not bad because I’ve found reality. Like when the Wizard of Oz was exposed as a two-bit magician, a great curtain of ignorance has been swept aside. I can’t get O.J. Simpson thrown in jail where he belongs. But I can shed light on what he and others like him are all about. My hope is that by doing so, other people will also be able to spot when these predators come into their lives, before it’s too late.



7 Comments on "A close encounter with a sociopath changes everything"

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  1. I’m glad you bring up the case of OJ who was awarded custody of his children. Because our civil and criminal courts do not recognize sociopathy exists, the children of sociopaths continue to be victims.



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  2. babs says:

    Thank you for that interesting insight into O.J. As I’m reading it, I couldn’t help being reminded of a certain King of Pop fallen from grace and whether that entertainer was also a sociopath. Perhaps one or both of his parents who were also sociopaths.



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  3. not Fred says:

    I saw all the incriminating evidence that the jury were never aloud to see at his double murder trial (more like a circus). I believe 110% that if the jury would have seen what I saw, it would have taken the jury 5 minutes of deliberation, and they would have found him guilty. After the trial, in which he was not found guilty, why did they make Simpson pay (I believe) more than 35 million dollars to the victims’ families? His book, he lost all rights to it. The rights were given to the Brown family, and they felt that the title of “If I had done it” lacked a certain authenticity to it, so they added “Confessions of the Killer”. Now Simpson again faces the law; throw away the key!



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  4. nottakingitanymore says:

    Key elements of his behavior : narcissism and a sense of entitlement.

    He doesn’t think he has to play by the same rules the rest of us do. That was reinforced by the fact that he “got away with murder.”

    I agree with Dr. Leedom and the author, the fact that he was awarded custody of his children is frightening to society and tragic for the children. Our legal system needs to be educated and reformed.



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  5. Buttons says:

    Donna, this is an older post, but it’s a very poignant one – exposure to spathy DOES change everything, if we Survive it.

    My experiences with spathy range from the ex spath spouse to a former business partner to a State Trooper to someone that proclaimed that I was her “…best friend in the world.”

    For a long time, I was very concerned that I would become “jaded” and actually push people away from me. The Divine Intervention of my finding this site, specifically, and reading, venting, posting, and absorbing has strengthened me to the point where I don’t feel compelled to ask, “Why do they do it?” anymore. They do it because they CAN.

    Though I have not allowed myself to become jaded, I do practice a healthy cynicism. I pay closer attention to people’s actions and behaviors – I didn’t even know what “glib” meant, and it’s still very difficult for me to describe it to another person. But, I know glib when I see it. Finally.

    I once complained to my partner that I hated being so naive. He responded by saying that naivete isn’t such a “bad thing,” as it demonstrated that I still maintained some sort of innocence. Today, I am far less naive than I once was. I am no longer innocent or ignorant of other human beings whose intentions are to inflict deliberate harm upon their fellow human beings.

    Without all of these experiences, I don’t believe that I would have had the strength or resolve to shut (slam) the door in the former spath friend’s face without a backward glance. Without having Survived my previous experiences, I would not have recognized the symptoms as soon as I did. I would have continued walking on eggshells and questioning my own judgment.

    This is an interesting aspect of pegging the spath for exactly what it is in relation to who I am: one gal who has known me for a couple of years said that she hadn’t like the spath from the minute that she met her and since I shed myself of this leech, she noticed a lighter tone in my voice, a 100% positive increase in my general outlook, and that I had become “who you’re supposed to be.”

    This article is important on so many levels. It not only addresses O.J. (Obvious Jerk), but it speaks to our everyday encounters with these people. Vigilance can never be underrated, and being Survivors, it is our mandate to keep our eyes wide open, our hearts and emotions secure to ourselves, and to excise the spath from our lives without a single regret.



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  6. I_survived_The_Bastard says:

    Buttons: I was interested you used the word ‘Jaded’ here. I have felt and still do on occasion. I seem to look at my life as pre and post Bastard and everything after, even the good stuff seems to have a slight tainted veil over it which I find very hard to remove.



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  7. kim frederick says:

    Hi Buttons. Where you been, girl? Nice to see ya.

    I agree, the word, glib, is a tough one to define. Is it the same thing as superficial charm? A facile sence of humor?

    I think I’ll google it and see.



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