| Sizing up the mark
Sociopaths never hesitate to exploit a vulnerability
Sociopaths divide the world into two groups of people: predators
and prey. They are the predators; everyone else is prey.
There are no rules of engagement. There is no compassion for the
vulnerable, no sympathy for the bereaved, no mercy for the innocent.
Your weakness is their opportunity.
Do any of the following traits describe you? If your answer is
yes, be aware that a sociopath will quickly figure it out and then
use it to manipulate you.
Lonely
Insecure
Trusting
Successful
Aspiring
Trustworthy
Nurturing
Committed
None of the above
Lonely
If you're feeling lonely for any reasonan empty love life,
a deceased spouse, a solo vacationyou might as well paint
a bull's eye on your forehead. As Dr. Robert Hare says, "The
callous use of the lonely is a trademark of sociopaths." They
stake out singles bars, read the obituaries and troll
Internet personal ads looking for opportunities to cash in.
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Insecure
Are you a whiz at work, but lacking in social skills? Do you feel
unattractiveperhaps a bit overweight? Is your self-esteem
a little shaky? If you have any insecurity, any self-doubt, any
feeling of inadequacyand who doesn'ta sociopath will
find it.
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Trusting
Maybe you're not street-smart, because you always stayed away from
the street. Maybe you avoid politics, even office politics. If you
generally accept what people tell you, if you're at all naïve
about the motivations of others, you're an easy target for a sociopath.
Do you believe people are basically good? You better learn that
there are exceptions.
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Successful
Perhaps you're wealthy. Perhaps you simply have a good job, discretionary
income and access to credit. From a sociopath's point of view, the
more you have, the more there is to take. And the sociopath you
run into may not be a common criminal. He may be your investment
banker.
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Aspiring
What do you wantcollege tuition for your kids, a comfortable
retirement, maybe just a little excitement? A sociopath can cook
up a plausible plan to deliver it. Even a get-rich-quick scheme
will seem legitimate. Just don't expect to see your dreams come
true.
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Trustworthy
You're an honest, forthright person. You take your obligations
seriously. You would never dream of taking advantage of someoneso
when a sociopath takes advantage of you, you won't see it coming.
If you play by the rules, know this: Sociopaths don't.
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Nurturing
"Sociopaths have an uncanny ability to spot and use 'nurturant'
womenthat is, those who have a powerful need to help or mother
others," says Dr. Robert Hare. These women often work as nurses,
counselors and social workers. They tend to look for the goodness
in others and overlook faults. Is that you? Watch out.
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Committed
When you give your word, it's good as gold. You see yourself as
a good wife or good husband, loyal to your spouse. You stay the
course, even when it looks like you've made a mistake. A sociopath
will understand, and keep bleeding you until there's nothing left.
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None of the above
Perhaps you're tough enough or savvy enough to avoid the pitfalls
listed above. Don't think you're immune. All kinds of people have
been manipulated by sociopathsincluding corrections officers
and psychiatrists who know what they are dealing with. Even "honor
among thieves" doesn't apply to sociopaths. Everyone is a target.
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