| Protect yourself from
sociopaths
Learn to recognize the traitsthen stay away
Sociopathy is a complex personality disorder. Sociopaths exhibit
a wide variety of maladaptive behavior which makes the condition
difficult to diagnose. Sociopathy is not one trait; it is a syndromea
cluster of related symptoms.
To help professionals accurately diagnose the sociopath (also
called a psychopath), Robert D. Hare, Ph.D., developed the Psychopathy
Checklist. This is not a quiz you can try at home; it is a tool
designed to be used exclusively by trained mental health professionals.
Dr.
Hare has identified key symptoms of psychopathy. Excerpts from
his descriptions of the symptoms appear below. (To be consistent
with his work, Lovefraud has substituted the term "psychopath"
for our usual use of "sociopath.") Lovefraud strongly
recommends that you read his entire book, Without
Conscience. The examples of behavior he includes with each
description are eye-opening and chilling.
If you're dealing with a person who exhibits some of these traits,
put your guard up. If that person shows many or all of these traits,
get him or her out of your life.
Dr. Robert Hare's Symptoms
of Psychopaths
© 1993 by Robert D. Hare,
PhD. Reprinted by permission of The Guilford Press.
Interpersonal traits
Glib and superficial
Egocentric and grandiose
Lack of remorse or guilt
Lack of empathy
Deceitful and manipulative
Shallow emotions
Antisocial lifestyle
Impulsive
Poor behavior controls
Need for excitement
Lack of responsibility
Early behavior problems
Adult antisocial behavior
The complete picture
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Glib and superficial
Psychopaths are often witty and articulate. They can be amusing
and entertaining conversationalists, ready with a quick and clever
comeback, and can tell unlikely but convincing stories that cast
themselves in a good light. They can be very effective in presenting
themselves well and are often very likable and charming.
Typically, psychopaths attempt to appear experts in sociology,
psychiatry, medicine, psychology, philosophy, poetry, literature,
art or law. A signpost to this trait is often a smooth lack of concern
at being found out that they are not.
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Egocentric and grandiose
Psychopaths have a narcissistic and grossly inflated view of their
self-worth and importance, a truly astounding egocentricity and
sense of entitlement. They see themselves as the center of the universe,
as superior beings who are justified in living according to their
own rules.
Psychopaths are seldom embarrassed about their legal, financial
or personal problems. Rather, they see them as temporary setbacks,
the results of bad luck, unfaithful friends or an unfair and incompetent
system.
Psychopaths feel that their abilities will enable them to become
anything they want to be. Given the right circumstancesopportunity,
luck, willing victimstheir grandiosity can pay off spectacularly.
For example, the psychopathic entrepreneur "thinks big,"
but it's usually with someone else's money.
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Lack of remorse or guilt
Psychopaths show a stunning lack of concern for the devastating
effects their actions have on others. Often they are completely
forthright about the matter, calmly stating that they have no sense
of guilt, are not sorry for the pain and destruction they have caused,
and that there is no reason for them to be concerned.
Psychopaths' lack of remorse or guilt is associated with a remarkable
ability to rationalize their behavior and to shrug off personal
responsibility for actions that cause shock and disappointment to
family, friends, associates and others who have played by the rules.
Usually they have handy excuses for their behavior, and in some
cases they deny that it happened at all.
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Lack of empathy
The feelings of other people are of no concern to psychopaths.
Psychopaths view people as little more than objects to be used for
their own gratification. The weak and the vulnerablewhom they
mock, rather than pityare favorite targets.
Psychopaths display a general lack of empathy. They are indifferent
to the rights and suffering of family members and strangers alike.
If they do maintain ties with their spouses or children it is only
because they see their family members as possessions, much like
their stereos or automobiles.
Because of their inability to appreciate the feelings of others,
some psychopaths are capable of behavior that normal people find
not only horrific but baffling. For example, they can torture and
mutilate their victims with about the same sense of concern that
we feel when we carve a turkey for Thanksgiving dinner.
However, except in movies and books, very few psychopaths commit
crimes of this sort. Their callousness typically emerges in less
dramatic, though still devastating, ways: parasitically bleeding
other people of their possessions, savings and dignity; aggressively
doing and taking what they want; shamefully neglecting the physical
and emotional welfare of their families; engaging in an unending
series of casual, impersonal and trivial sexual relationships; and
so forth.
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Deceitful and manipulative
Lying, deceiving and manipulation are natural talents for psychopaths.
Given their glibness and the facility with which they lie, it is
not surprising that psychopaths successfully cheat, bilk, defraud,
con and manipulate people and have not the slightest compunction
about doing so. They are often forthright in describing themselves
as con men, hustlers or fraud artists. Their statements often reveal
their belief that the world is made up of "givers and takers,"
predators and prey, and that it would be very foolish not to exploit
the weaknesses of others.
Some of their operations are elaborate and well thought out, whereas
others are quite simple: stringing along several women at the same
time, or convincing family members and friends that money is needed
"to bail me out of a jam." Whatever the scheme, it is
carried off in a cool, self-assured, brazen manner.
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Shallow emotions
Psychopaths seem to suffer a kind of emotional poverty that limits
the range and depth of their feelings. While at times they appear
cold and unemotional, they are prone to dramatic, shallow and short-lived
displays of feeling. Careful observers are left with the impression
that they are play-acting and that little is going on below the
surface.
Laboratory experiments using biomedical recorders have shown that
psychopaths lack the physiological responses normally associated
with fear. The significance of this finding is that, for most people,
the fear produced by threats of pain or punishment is an unpleasant
emotion and a powerful motivator of behavior. Not so with psychopaths;
they merrily plunge on, perhaps knowing what might happen but not
really caring.
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Impulsive
Psychopaths are unlikely to spend much time weighing the pros and
cons of a course of action or considering the possible consequences.
"I did it because I felt like it," is a common response.
More than displays of temper, impulsive acts often result from
an aim that plays a central role in most of the psychopath's behavior:
to achieve immediate satisfaction, pleasure or relief. So, family
members, employers and co-workers typically find themselves standing
around asking themselves what happenedjobs are quit, relationships
broken off, plans changed, houses ransacked, people hurt, often
for what appears to be little more than a whim.
Psychopaths tend to live day-to-day and to change their plans frequently.
They give little serious thought to the future and worry about it
even less.
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Poor behavior controls
In psychopaths, inhibitory controls are weak, and the slightest
provocation is sufficient to overcome them. As a result, psychopaths
are short-tempered or hot-headed and tend to respond to frustration,
failure, discipline and criticism with sudden violence, threats
and verbal abuse. They take offense easily and become angry and
aggressive over trivialities, and often in a context that appears
inappropriate to others. But their outbursts, extreme as they may
be, are generally short-lived, and they quickly resume acting as
if nothing out of the ordinary has happened.
Although psychopaths have a "hair trigger" and readily
initiate aggressive displays, their ensuing behavior is not out
of control. On the contrary, when psychopaths "blow their stack"
it is as if they are having a temper tantrum; they know exactly
what they are doing. Their aggressive displays are "cold;"
they lack the intense emotional arousal experienced by others when
they lose their temper.
It's not unusual for psychopaths to inflict serious physical or
emotional damage on others, sometimes routinely, and yet refuse
to acknowledge that they have a problem controlling their tempers.
In most cases, they see their aggressive displays as natural responses
to provocation.
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Need for excitement
Psychopaths have an ongoing and excessive need for excitementthey
long to live in the fast lane or "on the edge," where
the action is. In many cases the action involves breaking the rules.
Some psychopaths use a wide variety of drugs as part of their general
search for something new and exciting, and they often move from
place to place and job to job searching for a fresh buzz. Many psychopaths
describe "doing crime" for excitement or thrills.
The flip side of this yearning for excitement is an inability to
tolerate routine or monotony. Psychopaths are easily bored. You
are not likely to find them engaged in occupations or activities
that are dull, repetitive or that require intense concentration
over long periods.
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Lack of responsibility
Obligations and commitments mean nothing to psychopaths. Their
good intentions"I'll never cheat on you again"are
promises written on the wind.
Truly horrendous credit histories, for example, reveal the lightly
taken debt, the shrugged-off loan, the empty pledge to contribute
to a child's support. The irresponsibility and unreliability of
psychopaths extend to every part of their lives. Their performance
on the job is erratic, with frequent absences, misuse of company
resources, violations of company policy, and general untrustworthiness.
They do not honor formal or implied commitments to people, organizations
or principles.
Indifference to the welfare of childrentheir own as well
as those of a man or woman they happen to be living with at the
timeis a common theme among psychopaths. Psychopaths see children
as an inconvenience. Typically, they leave children on their own
for extended periods or in the care of unreliable sitters.
Psychopaths are frequently successful in talking their way out
of trouble"I've learned my lesson;" "You have
my word that it won't happen again;" "It was simply a
big misunderstanding;" "Trust me." They are almost
as successful in convincing the criminal justice system of their
good intentions and their trustworthiness. Although they frequently
manage to obtain probation, a suspended sentence or early release
from prison, they simply ignore the conditions imposed by the courts.
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Early behavior problems
Most psychopaths begin to exhibit serious behavioral problems at
an early age. These might include persistent lying, cheating, theft,
fire setting, truancy, class disruption, substance abuse, vandalism,
violence, bullying, running away and precocious sexuality. Because
many children exhibit some of these behaviors at one time or another,
especially children raised in violent neighborhoods or in disrupted
or abusive families, it is important to emphasize that the psychopaths's
history of such behaviors is more extensive and serious than that
of most others, even when compared with those of siblings and friends
raised in similar settings.
Early cruelty to animals is usually a sign of serious emotional
or behavioral problems. Cruelty to other childrenincluding
siblingsis often part of the young psychopaths's inability
to experience the sort of empathy that checks normal people's impulses
to inflict pain, even when enraged.
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Adult antisocial behavior
Psychopaths consider the rules and expectations of society inconvenient
and unreasonable, impediments to their inclinations and wishes.
They make their own rules, both as children and as adults.
Many of the antisocial acts of psychopaths lead to criminal convictions.
Even within prison populations psychopaths stand out, largely because
their antisocial and illegal activities are more varied and frequent
than are those of other criminals.
Not all psychopaths end up in jail. Many of the things they do
escape detection or prosecution, or are on the "shady side
of the law." For them, antisocial behavior may consist of phony
stock promotions, questionable business and professional practices,
spouse or child abuse, and so forth. Many others do things that,
although not illegal, are unethical, immoral or harmful to others:
philandering, cheating on a spouse, financial or emotional neglect
of family members, irresponsible use of company resources or funds,
to name but a few. The problem with behaviors of this sort is that
they are difficult to document and evaluate without the active cooperation
of family, friends, acquaintances and business associates.
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The complete picture
Psychopaths are not the only ones who lead socially deviant lifestyles.
For example, many criminals have some of the characteristics described
above, but because they are capable of feeling guilt, remorse, empathy
and strong emotions, they are not considered psychopaths. A diagnosis
of psychopathy is made only when there is solid evidence that the
individual matches the complete profilethat is, has most of
the above symptoms.
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